Greedy Boss Comic Strips

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1000 Results for Greedy Boss

View 1 - 10 results for greedy boss comic strips. Discover the best "Greedy Boss" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 12, 2001's comic on:


Tags #greedy boss, #huge growth earnings, #mean boss, #miss growth, #poised, #stock options vest, #unrelated move, #leave company

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "Our CEO says we are poised for huge growth in earnings." The Boss continues, "In an unrelated move, he announced that he will leave the company before any of his stock options vest." Wally and Dilbert look horrified and their ties fly up in front of their faces as The Boss says, "The poor guy will miss all of our growth."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 01, 1998's comic on:


Tags #good news, #budgets, #calculations, #salary bidget, #vacation days, #got greedy

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At the staff meeting, The Boss says, "Good news on your budgets. I did some recalculating last night." The Boss says, "I found a way to give more money to every project without increasing the total budget for projects!" Wally raises his hand and says, "Question: Does your new way involve poor math skills?" Wally has a question mark above his head. Alice puts her arm in front of him and says, "Ignore the skeptic. Hey, I have a suggestion!" Alice says, "Maybe you could recalculate the salary budget for next year." Dilbert says, "And when was the last time you recalculated the vacation days?" Wally, using his calculator wrist watch, says, "I calculate that we have an hour left for this meeting, but I'm interested in YOUR caculation." Dilbert, Wally and Alice walk out of the meeting counting stacks of money. Dilbert says, "I think we got greedy when we asked if he change for a five." They whistle as they leave.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 22, 2002's comic on:


Tags #investment banker, #merger success, #corrupt auditors, #corrupt cfo, #stock analysts, #greedy bankers, #clueless board memebers

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Headline: Dogbert the Investment Banker. Dogbert says to The Boss, "We have all of the elements to make the merger a success." Dogbert continues, "... Corrupt auditors, corrupt CEO, corrupt stock analysts, greedy bankers and clueless board members." The Boss asks, "And you?" Dogbert replies, "What are you implying?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 08, 2013's comic on:


Tags #gratitude, #managers & supervisors, #work ethic, #great leadership, #project, #useful things, #good work, #greedy, #business

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Boss: I'd like to thank myself for my great leadership on the project. Some of you did useful things, too, but only because I threatened to fire you if you didn't. So don't let it go to your heads. Catbert: I hope you didn't tell them they did good work. Boss: No, that makes them greedy.

Boss Can't Be Your Friend

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Boss Can't Be Your Friend - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 2016's comic on:


Tags #boss, #double standard, #employee, #hierarchy, #lunch, #rank, #guest artist, #jake tapper

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Man: Do you want to go to lunch? Boss: I can't be your friend because I'm your boss. Someday I might need to fire you, and it would be awkward if we were friends. Alice: Want to go to lunch? Boss: Sure.

Making Your Boss Look Good

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Making Your Boss Look Good - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 08, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #criticism, #ego, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #responsibility

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Boss: You did this wrong. Dilbert: That's how you trained me to do it. Bob: You need to learn to take responsibility for my mistakes. It's called "making your boss look good". Dilbert: Maybe you could help a little too.

Alice Makes Her Boss Look Good

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Alice Makes Her Boss Look Good - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 09, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #employees, #insults, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #sarcasm

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Boss: Alice, always remember that a good employee makes her boss look good. Alice: Maybe I could toss a blanket over you when other people are around. Boss: I'm not talking about my physical appearance. Alice: The blanket would also muffle the sound.

Fyi Boss

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Fyi Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 10, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #email, #managers & supervisors

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Boss: I've decided to be more of an "FYI Boss". I'll forward emails that already went to every employee and add a note saying, "FYI". Dilbert: Do you call that managing? Boss: No, I call it leading.

Everyone Is Their Own Boss

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Everyone Is Their Own Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 29, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #business, #decision, #employees, #company

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Man: At my company, every employee is their own boss. Dilbert: How do you make decisions? Man: Can I get back to you when we make one? It's only been two years.

Boss Needs Copies

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Boss Needs Copies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 08, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #frustrated, #irritation, #office, #office workers

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Boss: I need three copies of this. Carol: You just literally walked past the copier. Boss: Sheesh! Forget it! Just shred the stupid document. Carol: The shredder is right behind you.