Greeting Message Comic Strips
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106 Results for Greeting Message
View 1 - 10 results for greeting message comic strips. Discover the best "Greeting Message" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday December 17,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #phone, #answering machine, #greeting message, #demonstration, #Dogbert, #demonstrating
Transcript
Dilbert tells Dogbert, "I bought a phone answering machine." Dogbert asks, "Was the phone asking you questions you couldn't answer on your own?" Dilbert says, "The hard part is thinking of a greeting message." Dilbert says into the answering machine, "Hi. This is Dilbert. I'm not here right now." Dilbert says, "Well, technically I am here 'now' . . ." Dilbert says, "But 'now' is a relative term, so use your best judgment in deciding whether I'm here." Dilbert says, "Hmm . . . That was actually a creative little message." Dogbert says, "Demonstrating, once again, that subtle difference between creativity and complex stupidity."
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Thursday January 07,
2021
Incoming Message
Tags #distraction, #technology, #business, #text, #message, #phone, #respond
Transcript
dilbert: ...so what we need to do... phone on table: ding dilbert: okay, now you're only pretending to listen to me because your mind is on that incoming text message. would you like to look at it and respond? alice: only if you don't think you can wrap this up in fifteen seconds or so.
Wednesday February 09,
2011
Tags #mobile (cell) phones, #text message, #auto correction feature, #weather holds, #rude fresco, #auto correction, #feature
Transcript
Wally says, "I got your text message and I burped the grope plow armistice as you requested." Dilbert says, "Maybe you should turn off the auto-correction feature on your phone." Wally says, "If the weather holds, I'll flail the rude fresco tomorrow."
Monday October 01,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #invention, #alive, #holographic, #message, #Dogbert, #chile, #carne
Transcript
Dogbert yells, "Yikes! Dilbert's invention is alive!!" A flash of light comes from the device. An image of Dilbert's head appears and says, "I am a holographic recording of the late Dilbert, with a message to Dogbert from beyond the grave." Dogbert takes notes on a pad of paper as Dilbert says, ". . . And my recipe for chile con carne is as follows . . ."
Monday April 22,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #gigantic circles, #wheat, #british, #fields, #circles, #message, #extra-terrestrials, #deciphered, #surrendered
Transcript
Dilbert sits on a hassock watching television. The newscaster says, "Gigantic circles continue to appear in British wheat fields." The reporter continues, "Experts believe the circles are a message from extra-terrestrials . . ." The newscaster continues, "The message has been deciphered as 'Surrender or the wheat dies.'"
Monday November 25,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #president, #Dilbert, #opening, #supreme court, #old, #wandered, #nominating, #dog, #loyal, #george, #somebody, #message
Transcript
A presidential aide says to the President, "Mister President, there's another opening on the Supreme Court. One of the old guys wandered away." The aide continues, "I recommend nominating a dog this time. They tend to be loyal and everybody likes them." Dilbert hands Dogbert the phone and says, "It's for you . . . George somebody." Dogbert says, "Take a message."
Friday May 01,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #designing, #greeting, #Card, #death, #occasion, #working, #humorous, #angle, #roses, #red, #violets, #blue, #cardboard, #stiff
Transcript
Dogbert stands at the table reading a card. Dilbert asks, "How are you coming on designing your greeting cards for death occasions?" Dogbert replies, "Okay. Now I'm working on the humorous angle." Dilbert reads, "Roses are red, / Violets are blue, / Cardboard is stiff, / And so are you."
Thursday July 02,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #captain, #bob, #eat, #survivors, #cannibal, #mountain, #village, #message, #snowball, #snow
Transcript
Dogbert, Dilbert, a man in a pilot's uniform and another man stand on a snow-covered mountain where their airplane crashed. Dogbert says, "Captain Bob, I think you're planning to eat the other survivors." Captain Bob replies, "Ha ha! Too bad your only hope is to send a message to the village at the base of this mountain." Dogbert throws a snowball at the captain, knocking him off his feet. Dogbert says, "When you roll into town, tell them Dogbert sent you."
Saturday April 03,
1993
Tags #Dogbert, #master, #earth, #message, #creature, #king, #retiring, #soft, #pillow
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a desk chair and says into a video camera, "This is Dogbert, Master of Earth, with a message to all creatures . . ." There is a satellite dish on the desk. A man and woman sit on their couch holding Dogbert signs and watching television. Dogbert says on tv, "I realized that you are all unworthy of having me as your king. I am retiring to go sit on a soft pillow." Dogbert lies on his pillow listening to the radio. Dogbert thinks, "No matter what I do, it always feels better when I stop doing it."
Tuesday June 08,
1993
Tags #Dogbert, #broadcast, #message, #computer, #geeks, #declare, #leader, #empire, #virtiual, #electronic, #venod, #exploiting, #leadership, #tradition
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a desk chair and types on the computer, "This is Dogbert, with a broadcast e-mail message to all computer geeks . . ." A man reads Dogbert's message on his computer. The message says, "I declare myself to be your leader, and I name my empire the 'Virtual Electronic Nation of Dogbert,' Venod for short." Dilbert looks over Dogbert's shoulder and says, "I assume you'll be exploiting the simple people of Venod for personal gain." Dogbert replies, "Yeah, it's a leadership tradition."