Grow Beard Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

64 Results for Grow Beard

View 1 - 10 results for grow beard comic strips. Discover the best "Grow Beard" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 2002's comic on:

Tags #grow beard, #while unemployed, #message, #who you are, #shopping cart, #filthy rags

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert is sitting on Dilbert's bed. Dilbert asks, "Do you think I should grow a beard while I'm unemployed?" Dogbert replies, "That's a great idea. A beard sends a message about who you are." Dilbert responds, "Um.. Okay." Dogbert says, "I assume you already have a shopping cart and filthy rags."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 1996's comic on:

Tags #grow a beard, #ted, #not smart enough, #grows horn

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Wally and Ted are drinking coffee. Ted says, "I've decided to mask my boyish looks by growing a beard." As he and Dilbert walk away, Wally says, "I didn't think Ted was smart enough to know how to grow a beard." Dilbert laughs. The caption says, "Two weeks later." Ted points to a beard growing on his forehead and says to the Boss, "How do you like my beard?" The Boss thinks, "My search for a new manager is over."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 04, 1996's comic on:

Tags #promoted ted, #new manager, #new beard, #grow from forehead, #wrong, #punish them, #bad opinions

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss gestures toward Ted and says to Alice and Dilbert, "I promoted Ted to be your new manager. I used to think he looked boyish, but his new beard has changed that." Alice and Dilbert look shocked. Alice asks, "Are either of you the least bit concerned that Ted's beard is growing from his forehead?" As they walk away, Ted says to the Boss, "She made it sound as if it's wrong." The Boss says, "You can punish them for having bad opinions."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 06, 2004's comic on:

Tags #bad news coming, #time stopped, #grows beard, #eternity later, #boss forgets

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Time has stopped until my boss gives me the bad news that he hinted was coming. Maybe I'll use the time to invent a new language and grow a beard. An Eternity later Dilbert: EE_YO NEBABA WANPONU GREP> The boss: I forgot why I wanted to talk to you.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 05, 2011's comic on:

Tags #cruelty, #employees, #employee of month, #october 1929, #room to grow, #past date, #past month, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Congratulations, Asok. I'm naming you employee of the month. Your month is October 1929. Room to grow.

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 1995's comic on:

Tags #computer holy wars, #scruffy beard, #suspenders, #smug expression, #unix computer user, #nickel, #better computer, #holy wars

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally approaches another employee and says, "Hold it right there, buddy." Wally continues, "That scruffy beard . . . those suspenders . . . that smug expression . . ." Wally concludes, "You're one of those condescending Unix computer users!" The man responds, "Here'a nickel, kid. Get yourself a better computer."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 05, 1996's comic on:

Tags #beard, #close my eyes, #crazy beard, #new boss, #pet emplyee, #spin chair

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted, Alice and Dilbert sit at a conference table. Ted says, "As your new boss I have yet to select my 'pet' employee. I shall do this by closing my eyes and pointing the beard on my forehead." Ted sits facing away from the table with his eyes closed. He says, "To make it fair, I'll close my eyes while one of you spins my chair!" As Alice pushes Ted's chair into the stairwell Dilbert whispers, "Alice . . . Um . . . Technically this isn't 'spinning.'"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 09, 1997's comic on:

Tags #growing beard, #hide no chin, #loose sweaters, #no waist, #sherlock holmes outfir, #no clue, #mannnequins, #friends

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally is sitting with his tray of food at a table in the company cafeteria. Dilbert is about to sit down. Wally says, "I'm thinking of growing a beard to disguise the fact that I have no chin." Alice joins Wally and Dilbert at the table. Wally continues, "Then I'll get some loose sweaters to disguise the fact that I have no waist." Alice says, "Maybe you should get a Sherlock Holmes outfit to disguise the fact that you have no clue." Wally says, "Perhaps some mannequins as friends."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 1999's comic on:

Tags #wally report, #hair grow long, #ponytail, #artistic side, #collect coffee mugs, #meeting, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally, Dilbert and the boss sit in a meeting. Wally's hair shoots up on either side of his bald spot. Wally says, "In this week's "Wally Report, " I've decided to let my hair grow long in the back." Wally says, "Eventually, I'll put it in a ponytail to show I have an artistic side." The boss says, "What's your artitstic side?" Wally says, "I collect coffee mugs."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 1999's comic on:

Tags #doctor dogbert, #herbal therapy, #eat lawn, #storm gutters, #hair grow back, #perscription

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: "Doctor Dogbert" Dogbert wears a crown and stethoscope. A bald man in black socks and boxers sits on the examining table. Dogbert says, "I'm putting you on extreme herbal therapy." Dogbert writes a prescription and says, "Come to my house once a week and eat my lawn down to one inch." The man gets dressed. Dogbert says, "After six months, if your hair doesn't grow back, I have more herbs in my storm gutters."