Hand Shaking Situation Comic Strips

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423 Results for Hand Shaking Situation

View 1 - 10 results for hand shaking situation comic strips. Discover the best "Hand Shaking Situation" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bonus, did well, hiring freeze, shrink empire, hand shaking situation, hand, questioning clean

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Wally is sitting at his desk. The Boss approaches from behind with a check in hand. He says, "The company did well so you get a bonus despite the fact you did no work all year." After handing Wally the check, The Boss continues, "I'd fire you but I can't replace you because there's a hiring freeze and I don't want to shrink my empire." The Boss fidgets nervously and says, "This might be a hand-shaking situation but I don't know where your hand has been." Wally continues to stare at his check and brushes The Boss with, "Off you go."

Dilbert Characters

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags paperless office concept, restroom situation

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The Boss, Wally and Dilbert sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Since implementing our 'paperless office' concept, we've saved . . ." The Boss looks at a figure written on the back of his hand and says, "Uh . . . ten percent!" Wally looks at his arm and says, "Next on the agenda: the restroom situation . . ."

Hand Sanitizer

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Hand Sanitizer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags office workers, business, hand sanitizer, addicted, overuse, face mask, covid-19, pandemic

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dilbert: i'm getting addicted to hand sanitizer. it started with my hands, but over time, i extended it up to my forearms, then behind my ears, and it just kept going. dilbert: want a squirt? alice: i don't know where that thing has been.

Shaking Hands

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Shaking Hands - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, invent, Alternative, handshake, high-five, month, coffee

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boss: i've invented an alternative to shaking hands. you raise one hand up like the start of a high-five and stop. what do you think? dilbert: why don't you try it for a month and tell me how it goes?

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, ventriloquism, information overload, libertarian, taxidermist, hand hole, work, like puppet, creepy, business

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Alice says, "His brain shut down from information overload, so I asked a libertarian taxidermist to stuff him." Alice says, "There's a hand hole in the back so we can work him like a puppet." Dilbert says, "It's sort of creepy." Alice says, "You'll get used to it."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags engineers, managers & supervisors, ventriloquism, finishing projects, early, powerpoint, presentation, executive retreat, dead boss hand puppet, business

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Man says, "The engineering department is finishing all of their projects early and we don't know why." CEO says, "Tell them to do a powerpoint presentation at the next executive retreat to share their methods." Asok says, "Now it's my turn to use the dead boss hand puppet!" Alice says, "Uh-oh."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cartoonists, ventriloquism, writing, hand puppet, data overload, ridiculous, poorly written story, case closed

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Police says, "We have a report of a pointy-haired boss being stunned by data overload, stuffed, and used as a hand puppet." Alice says, "That's ridiculous. It sounds like the plot of a poorly written story arc." Police says, "It sounds poorly drawn too." Alice says, "Case closed, right?"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fraternization, bad haircut, poor font choice, hand sanitizer, substance over style

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Alice: I'm judging the quality of your business case by your bad haircut and your poor font choice. I plan to use a quart of hand sanitizer when I'm done touching your document. Man: I value substance over style. Alice: How's that working out?

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dont know, flashdrive, gadgets, hand, illness, where its been, data

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Coworker: I put the data on a Flash drive for you. Dilbert: Get that thing away from me. I don't know where it's been. Coworker: I hope you mean the Flash drive and not my hand. Dilbert: I did. But you raise a good point about the hand.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags employees, executives, non giant situation, shoulders of giants, non giant, business

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CEO: As your CEO, if I have seen farther, it is only because I stood on the shoulders of giants. Plus whatever is going on over here. Dilbert: That's sort of a non-giant situation. Wally: And I haven't had shoulders since I was ten.