Hard On Survivors Comic Strips

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327 Results for Hard On Survivors

View 1 - 10 results for hard on survivors comic strips. Discover the best "Hard On Survivors" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #layoff list, #Wally, #claimed chair, #few minutes ago, #hard on survivors

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Ted says to Wally, "I hear you're on the layoff list, Wally. Has anyone claimed your chair yet?" A man says, "I claimed it a few minutes ago." Ted yells, "Liar!" As the two men fight, Wally says, "I guess it's true what they say about layoffs being hard on the survivors."

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Hard Work Is Necessary For Success

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Hard Work Is Necessary For Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #misunderstanding, #motivation, #hard work, #Advice, #brainwash

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Wally: Remember, Asok, success requires hard work and sacrifice. Asok: Got it! I will work hard and sacrifice! Wally: I was going to say that's why you should avoid success. Who brainwashed you?

You Have To Work Hard To Succeed

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You Have To Work Hard To Succeed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #Wally, #work, #hard, #single, #day, #years, #succeed, #topic

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The Boss: If you want to succeed, you have to work hard every single day for years. Dilbert: That sounds awful. You just talked me out of wanting to succeed. Did you work that hard to get where you are? The Boss: Next topic!

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #hard work, #lateral promotion, #new job, #old job, #money involved, #saving it

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Boss: I'd like to reward you for your hard work by giving you a lateral promotion. I was going to hire from the outside, but I realized I can make you do the new job plus your old one. Dilbert: Is money involved? Boss: Yes! I'm saving a ton of it!

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #pasta, #antipasto, #hungry, #socrates, #plato, #question, #hard, #philosophy, #man, #tree, #rock

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors under a tree. Dogbert says, "If a man eats a pound of pasta and a pound of antipasto . . ." Dogbert continues, ". . . Would they cancel each other out, leaving the man still hungry?" Dilbert says, "I can't imagine Socrates and Plato debating that question." Dogbert asks, "Too hard, huh?"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #comrade, #dogsky, #electronic, #secrets, #soviet man, #microfiche, #hard copy, #cripple, #empire, #evil

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Dogbert walks down a sidewalk and a man in a trenchcoat says, "Pssst . . . Comrade Dogsky. Will you sell your master's electronic secrets to nice Soviet man?" Dogbert asks, "Will you be wanting them on microfiche or hard copy?" Back at home, Dilbert asks, "You're going to cripple the WHAT?" Dogbert, who is carrying plans, replies, "Evil empire. Trust me on this."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #supervisor, #career, #path, #secetary, #years, #doctor, #expect, #hard work

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Dilbert says to a man at a desk, "As your new supervisor, I want to discuss your career path." Dilbert asks, "You're a secretary now, but what do you want to be in two years?" The man replies, "A famous actor . . . Or maybe a doctor." Dilbert says, "Uh . . . I don't think I can help you here . . ." The man replies, "Oh, right, but you'll expect me to work hard for you."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #woman, #self deprication, #utter, #turn, #silly, #hard

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Dilbert walks down the office hallway and thinks, "Forgot my keys." Dilbert thinks, "I'll have to slap my forehead and mutter when I turn around, otherwise I'll look silly." As two people watch, Dilbert smacks himself and his glasses fly off his head. Dilbert thinks, "Too hard."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #one, #ticket, #slignshot, #flight, #elbonia, #elbonian's, #capital, #class, #coach, #first, #intentionally, #fling, #hard

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Dilbert approaches the "Air Elbonia" counter and says to the clerk, "Give me one ticket for the slingshot flight to Elbonia's capital." The airline ticket agent asks, "Do you want first class or coach?" Dilbert asks, "What's the difference?" The clerk replies, "With first class we don't intentionally fling you toward something hard."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #captain, #bob, #eat, #survivors, #cannibal, #mountain, #village, #message, #snowball, #snow

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Dogbert, Dilbert, a man in a pilot's uniform and another man stand on a snow-covered mountain where their airplane crashed. Dogbert says, "Captain Bob, I think you're planning to eat the other survivors." Captain Bob replies, "Ha ha! Too bad your only hope is to send a message to the village at the base of this mountain." Dogbert throws a snowball at the captain, knocking him off his feet. Dogbert says, "When you roll into town, tell them Dogbert sent you."