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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 21, 2012's comic on:

Tags #gods, #inventions, #physics, #build an ark, #higgs boson, #trouble, #computer, #works achievement, #technology

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Dilbert: Gasp! I've found the Higgs boson! Higgs Boson: Build an ark! Dilbert: Nothing but trouble.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 2012's comic on:

Tags #carbon dioxide, #exhales endangered species, #fabrications, #harbard, #higgs boson particle, #licorice and flashlight, #national football league, #no bragging rights, #no kids, #training for olympics

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Coworker: My daughter is training for the Olympics. My son is going to Harvard. Dilbert: I have no spawn of my own, so I claim the right to name a proxy to brag on my behalf. Topper, I need you. Topper: OF course you do. My daughter discovered the Higgs boson particle using nothing but licorice and a flashlight. My son inhales carbon dioxide and exhales endangered species while playing in the National Football League. Coworker: This isn't fair! You can't just make up stuff! Topper: According to the president of the International Society of Boasters, fabrications are acceptable. Coworker: I'd like to talk to that guy. Topper: You're looking at him. Dilbert: I win.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 22, 2013's comic on:

Tags #anger, #honesty, #corporate culture, #micromanaging, #higgs - boson, #taboo, #new culture

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Boss: I'm looking for ideas on how we can improve our corporate culture. Alice: You could start by being less of a micromanaging d-bag who hides like a Higgs-boson whenever we need a decision. Boss: That didn't help. Alice: Will honesty still be taboo in the new culture?

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 04, 2012's comic on:

Tags #elections, #online (web) news, #patents, #libor rates, #higgs bison, #patent law, #electoral college

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Boss: Here's some news I don't understand about libor rates. Here's some news I don't understand about the Higgs boson. Remind me why we have news. Catbert: I think it has something to do with patent law and the electoral college.