Hot Line Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

223 Results for Hot Line

View 1 - 10 results for hot line comic strips. Discover the best "Hot Line" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #hot line, #telephone, #forehead, #phone calls

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert points to a telephone on the desk and says to Dogbert, "This is the new 'hot line' phone to the Kremlin. My company won the bid to engineer the new model." Dilbert says as he walks away, "That's a fully functional prototype, so don't mess with it." Dogbert picks up the phone and says, "So, Gorby, I understand you've been finger-painting with your forehead . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #prank, #prototype, #hot line, #phone, #capitalism, #communism, #prank call

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Dogbert plays a reckless prank with Dilbert's prototype 'hot line' to the Kremlin." Dogbert sits at a desk and says into the telephone, "Hey Gorby, did you hear this quote . . ." Dogbert quotes, "Communism is the most painful path between capitalism and capitalism." Dogbert says, "'Fire one?' Ha ha ha . . . What a kidder you are."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #hands of death, #protest, #movie, #boycott, #redhead, #hot tempered, #ignorant, #stereotype, #boycot, #pound, #pulp, #sean, #dennis

View Transcript

Transcript

Two men form a picket line in front of a movie theater showing a movie titled, "Hands of Death." Dogbert walks around the corner. Dogbert asks one of the men holding a sign, "Why are you protesting against this movie?" The man replies, "It portrays red heads as hot tempered and ignorant." Dogbert asks, "How many red heads are in the movie?" The man replies, "One. But the point is, red heads don't fit their stereotype of being hot tempered and ignorant." Dogbert says, "Actually, ignorance was never a stereotype of red heads until you brought it up here." The man yells at the other protester, "Sean, you idiot! I told you!" Sean replies, "Shut up, Dennis! I'll pound you to a pulp!!" As they fight each other, Dogbert adds, "And 'boycott' is spelled with a double 'T.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #advice from dog, #pick up line, #ultimate pick up line, #criticism completes me, #low self esteem, #woman responds, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm going to a singles mixer tonight. Do you have any advice? Dogbert: Don't I always?" "It's all about knowing what a woman needs. Find a woman who looks hot, carve her out from the herd and read this. Dilbert: What is it?" Dogbert: It's the ultimate pick up line. Dilbert: Um...Hi. Excuse me. Criticism completes me. woman: He's a keeper.

Hot And Cold In The Office

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Hot And Cold In The Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #temperature, #thermostat, #disagreement, #hot, #cold

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I accomplished nothing this week because the office is so cold my hands turned into blocks of ice. Dilbert: I accomplished nothing this week because the office is so hot I can't concentrate. Boss: Are the two of you the same species? Dilbert: That's a gray area because it would be impossible for us to mate.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #illness, #industrial sludge, #drank, #has tail, #lower iq points, #bright future, #quality assurance, #marketing, #zip line guide, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: He's been like this since our CEO made him drink a glass of our industrial sludge at a press conference. It looped a few points off his I.Q., but he's still has a bright future in quality assurance or maybe marketing. And with his new tail he'd be an awesome zip line guide.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #rich people, #top 1%, #Women, #sisters, #hot, #attraction, #co worker, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Now that I'm a top one-percenter, I wonder what kind of women I'll attract. Do you have any sisters back home? I'm asking because you'd be totally hot if you were a woman. So I'm thinking hoo-ah! Asok: I cannot count the number of ways this is wrong.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #computer, #program, #pick-up line, #mel gibson, #savage

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk working on his computer. Dilbert says to Dogbert, who is sitting next to him, "I've designed this program to generate the most effective pick-up line in the universe." Dilbert continues, "Ha ha! Women will be helpless when they hear my clever opener. . . . And the line is . . ." Dilbert reads on the screen, "Hi. I'm Mel Gibson. Did you see a dingo dog go by here with my shirt?" Dogbert says, "Kiss me, you wicked savage."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stock market, #no raise, #accomplished nothing, #invest in penny stocks, #hot stock tips, #narrowed the gap, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Wally, I can't give you a raise because you accomplished nothing this year. Wally: That's okay because I make a fortune investing in penny stocks. Do you want some hot stock tips? Dilbert: Did you get a raise. Wally: No, but I narrowed the gap between his income and mine.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #working, #designing, #line, #cards, #death, #occasions, #funeral, #dead, #sentimental

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at the table writing on some cards. Dilbert asks, "What are you working on?" Dogbert replies, "I'm designing a line of cards for death occasions." Dogbert continues, "You know how sometimes you can't make it to the funeral, so you want to send a card instead . . ." Dilbert reads, "I'm sorry you're dead." Dogbert asks, "Is it too sentimental?"