Human Clone Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

353 Results for Human Clone

View 1 - 10 results for human clone comic strips. Discover the best "Human Clone" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags scientits, unethical scientits, human clone, infomercial

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: My wealth - building system has been verified by actual scientists. Dogbert: where can I find an unethical scientist? And if Im to busy, my human clone can do your infomercial. Dogbert: good prices.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags clone of boss, procedure failure, knick knack, small creature, part horse, part human, tiney, antennas

View Transcript

Transcript

A tiny centaur is standing on a table. He says to Dilbert, "I'm a clone of your boss?" Dilbert responds, "The procedure didn't exactly work. So you're not so much a human being as you are a..." Centaur, "God?" Dilbert responds, "Knickknack."

Human Intelligence

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Human Intelligence  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ai, artificial intelligence, humans, arguing, human nature, intelligence, deception

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I started by giving the device human intelligence. Then I added human emotions. Now it answers every question by accusing you of having a secret agenda. Boss: Just like people!

Wally's Device Has Human Emotions

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Device Has Human Emotions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags artificial intelligence, ai, invention, human, humanity, misanthrope

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Is it true that you invented a device with human intelligence and human emotions? Wally: Yes. I'd give you a demo, but the device is depressed and wants to be left alone. Dilbert: It looks like a block of wood. Wally: I'm only trying to copy the human mind. There's no reason to over-engineer it. Dilbert: I can respect that.

Phone Better Than Human

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 Phone Better Than Human  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, distraction, human, conversation

View Transcript

Transcript

Alan: Everything went wrong for me this week. I have problems... all kinds of problems. Dilbert: For the zillionth time in a row, my phone is more fun than talking to a human.

Extra Dogbert Clone

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Extra Dogbert Clone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, marketing, genius, problem, company, situation, clone, blame

View Transcript

Transcript

the marketing genius dogbert: my genius alone will not be enough to fix the problems at this company. this looks like a five-dogbert situation. that is why i arranged to clone myself five times. boss: what's the extra clone for? dogbert: that one takes the blame.

Human Walking This Way

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Human Walking This Way - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags coronavirus, exercise, fish, health, human, social distancing, walking, water

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert walking outside thinking: uh-oh. a human being is walking in my direction. dilbert jumping over wall into river: aaaagh!!! fish in water by dilbert: i need to ask you to back up six feet.

No Human Contact

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Human Contact - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags home, human, contact, self isolation, quarantine, coronavirus, health, oxytocin, lonely

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert at home: i haven't had any human contact for months. dilbert wearing face mask sitting on couch with dogbert: people need physical contact to keep their oxytocin at healthy levels. dogbert: get away from me. dilbert: maybe if we both close our eyes.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags contracts, lawyers, surgery, software server, too confusing, normal human, comprehension, cost eefective, involve atorneys, deal so small, medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Your software services contract is too confusing for any normal human to comprehend." Dilbert says, "And it wouldn't be cost- effective to involve our attorneys for a deal so small." Dilbert says, "So I'll just take chance and sign it." Man says, "Doc... scrub in. I got the liver."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags babies, complaining, human resources, evil director, discriminates, short, bald, near sighted, born this way, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: My boss discriminates against me because I'm short, bald, and near-sighted. It's not my fault. I was born this way. Woman: And who is this little... whoa! Hello. Catbert: evil director of Human Resources. Literally.