Improve Communication Comic Strips
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162 Results for Improve Communication
View 1 - 10 results for improve communication comic strips. Discover the best "Improve Communication" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday October 31,
1998
Tags #cubicle walls, #improve communication, #worst ideas, #noblest reasons, #leashed and branded, #improve morale
Transcript
The Boss, Dilbert and Wally are in a meeting. The boss reads from a piece of paper. The boss says, "Cubicle walls will be removed "in order to improve communication." Dilbert says, "Why do the worst ideas always have the noblest sounding reasons?" The Boss reads more from the report. The Boss says, "Employees will be leashed and branded "in order to improve morale."
Sunday November 27,
1994
Tags #south wing, #cubicle, #improve communication, #project team, #pawn in the game, #new dress code, #dressed like pawns
Transcript
The Boss tells Dilbert, "I'm moving you to a cubicle in the south wing." Dilbert asks, "Why?" The Boss answers, "Umm . . . It's more efficient if my group is all in one place." Dilbert replies, "Not for me. The people on my project team are all in this wing." The Boss says, "It will improve communication in our group." Dilbert replies, "I don't need to communicate with my group. I only need to work with my project team." Dilbert continues, "I'll bet another manager wants that same cubicle in the south wing. I think I'm just a pawn in your little game." The Boss says, "You move tomorrow. By the way, there's a new dress code." Dilbert and Wally wear chess pawn costumes. Dilbert says, "You're in my cubicle." Wally replies, "You can only move to a diagonal cubicle."
Friday November 09,
2001
Tags #town hall meeting, #improve communication, #actual town hall
Transcript
The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "We're going to have a 'town hall' meeting to improve communication." The Boss continues, "But it's not actually in an actual town hall. And I'll have questions in advance, so it's not a meeting per se." Wally asks, "Who do we give our questions to?" The Boss replies, "I think you'll find that it doesn't matter."
Monday August 16,
2004
Tags #meeting, #improve communication, #imitates boss, #business
Transcript
Man: I called this meeting so I could tell you the division's goals for next year. Alice: Thats a good idea because we're all so dumb that we coldly possibly read this in email. Goal one: Improve communication. ALiceL I can't. Im too dumb.
Tuesday March 19,
2013
Tags #didn't read, #email, #improve communication, #long rambling email, #someone else, #meeting, #business
Transcript
The Boss: Did everyone read about how to improve our communication? Dilbert: Was it a long rambling email that stumbled from one barely coherent point to another? The Boss: That one must have been from someone else. Dilbert: Good because I didn't read it.
Sunday August 29,
1993
Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #Wally, #alice, #communication, #management, #office culture
Transcript
The Boss tells Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "What we need is more communication between management and . . . Whatever you are." The Boss continues, "So, once a month I'll have 'open door day.'" The Boss explains, "You can drop by and whine about anything you want." The Boss continues, "I'll listen with a concerned expression like this." The Boss continues, "Then I'll explain why everything is fine just the way it is." The Boss continues, "Then, morale will improve, profits will skyrocket and my stock options will make me RICH!! Dilbert says, "May I make some observations about your plan?" Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Forget it." The Boss asks, "Do you notice how concerned I look?"
Sunday April 10,
2016
Tags #communication, #managers, #training, #obstacle, #laziness
Transcript
Dilbert: Can I take a class to improve my communication skills? Boss: What are you talking about? Dilbert: I want to take a class that teaches me how to communicate better. Boss: I don't understand what you're asking me. Dilbert: I am asking permission to take a class to help me communicate better. Boss: I see your lips moving but I can't figure out what you're asking. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! There's no way to get there from here! Boss: I'm glad I took that management class on how to not listen. It already paid off.
Thursday August 08,
2019
Poor Communication Skills
Tags #communication, #employees, #office, #office workers, #questions, #projects
Transcript
Man: Would you like to be on my project team? Dilbert: Hard pass. Your communication skills are so poor that the project is doomed to failure. Man: I meant to say your boss already assigned you to my project. Dilbert: We're off to a good start.
Wednesday September 11,
2019
More Communication
Tags #boss, #communication, #confused, #distraction, #irony, #managers & supervisors
Transcript
Boss: What we need in this office is more communication and fewer distractions. Dilbert: Your goals are mutually exclusive. If you communicate more, you'll be distracting us more. Boss: Now I've lost my train of thought. Dilbert: Did my communication distract you?
Saturday April 02,
2011
Tags #complaining, #communication skills, #poor skills, #random numbers, #spreadsheet, #clarify, #listening skills
Transcript
Woman says, "This isn't what I wanted." Dilbert says, "I know." Dilbert says, "Your communication skill are so poor that I gave up trying to understand what you wanted and instead put some random numbers on a spreadsheet." Woman says, "Why didn't you just ask me to clarify?!" Dilbert says, "Apparently your listening skills need work too."