Information Requested Comic Strips
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188 Results for Information Requested
View 1 - 10 results for information requested comic strips. Discover the best "Information Requested" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday October 02,
1998
Tags #tina tech writer, #engineers, #information requested, #sow seeds, #destruction, #snarling, #compose email
Transcript
Tina the tech writer sits at her computer. Tina writes, "To: All Engineers. From: Tina the Tech Writer." Tina grimaces. Tina writes, "Give me the information I requested, or sow the seeds of your own destruction!" Tina thinks, "One should never compose e-mail while one is snarling."
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday October 19,
2018
Yelling At Tina
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #tina, #information, #requested, #disappointment, #normal, #tone, #voice, #yelling
Transcript
The Boss: Tina says you yelled at her for not having the information you requested. Incorrect. I expressed my disappointment with a normal tone of voice. The Boss: Stop yelling at me!!! Dilbert: I no longer know what "yelling" means.
Wednesday November 18,
2020
Information From Carl
Tags #office workers, #colleagues, #rude, #mumble, #ignorance, #information, #business, #stalk, #cubicle, #layers
Transcript
Tina: i almost got some information from carl. i stalked him to his cubicle and penetrated his outer defense of rudeness. but i never broke through his mumble layer. dilbert: wait until you get to his ignorance layer.
Wednesday April 06,
2011
Tags #managers & supervisors, #ventriloquism, #information overload, #libertarian, #taxidermist, #hand hole, #work, #like puppet, #creepy, #business
Transcript
Alice says, "His brain shut down from information overload, so I asked a libertarian taxidermist to stuff him." Alice says, "There's a hand hole in the back so we can work him like a puppet." Dilbert says, "It's sort of creepy." Alice says, "You'll get used to it."
Thursday August 11,
2011
Tags #business ethics, #taxes, #sociopth, #victimless crime, #insider information, #hedge fund, #split profit, #tax people
Transcript
Dogbert: The great thing about being a sociopath is that everything feels like a victimless crime. If you give me some insider information for my hedge fund, I'll split the profit with you. Think of it as a tax on people you don't know. CEO: That's the best kind!
Wednesday January 04,
2012
Tags #suspicion, #thinking, #new information, #project scope, #anticipate, #think
Transcript
Dilbert: Based on this new information, you'll want to change our project scope. Boss: I don't do that. Dilbert: What? Think? Today I learned it's better if I don't try to guess what people mean.
Monday April 23,
2012
Tags #business ethics, #lawyers & attorneys, #apps, #contact information, #users address books, #data, #office, #desk, #meeting, #store data, #business
Transcript
Coworker: Please tell me our apps don't steal contact information from our users' address books. Boss: We upload the data but we don't store it. Coworker: That's like saying I can date your wife if I put a bag over her head. Boss: That could work. Coworker: I don't think I'm getting through to you.
Sunday July 01,
2012
Tags #extensive plastic surgery, #face, #gadgets, #information services, #office equipment, #swine, #to log on
Transcript
Mordac: I am Mordac, the preventer of information services. Dilbert: I know. We've worked together for years. Mordac: And it still sounds awesome when I say it. Anyway, I up-graded our network security to include facial recognition. Your temporary password is this face. You'll need extensive plastic surgery to log on the first time. Dilbert: You've gone too far, Mordac! I will escalate this! Boss: I wish we'd had this conversation a week ago.
Friday August 30,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #helen, #man, #resume, #requested, #formula, #calculate, #ratio, #height, #baldness, #Men, #different, #nights
Transcript
Man: I hope you'll date me now, Helen. I brought my resume as you requested. Helen: There's a little formula I use to calculate the ratio of your earnings potential to your height and baldness... Hmm... You pass. Of course, I'll still date other men too. Man: On different nights?
Monday January 20,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #trader, #stocks, #illegal, #trading, #information, #board, #meeting, #san francisco
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I've decided to become an inside trader of stocks." Dilbert replies, "Inside trading is illegal. Besides, where will you get your information?" Dogbert raises his ears and says, "Shhh . . . I hear a board meeting starting San Francisco."