Invited Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

33 Results for Invited

View 1 - 10 results for invited comic strips. Discover the best "Invited" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meetings, #discuss project, #civility is dead, #invited to meeting, #office

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: What's a good time to get together and discuss my project? Dilbert: Never. Every interaction I've had with you has been a waste of time. I have no reason to think it will be different in the future. Coworker: Sheesh! How did civility die? Dilbert: Maybe you invited it to a meeting.

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #invited to worthless meetings, #say no, #sense of self, #can't be bothered

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Dogbert, I need your help. I keep getting invited to worthless meetings and I can't say no." Dilbert continues, "YOU can say no to anything. You have such a clearly defined sense of self-interest." Dilbert asks, "Will you teach me to be like you?" Dogbert replies, "Nope . . . can't be bothered."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #4 hour meeting, #company sadist, #donuts, #invited, #no agenda, #suppose to hurt

View Transcript

Transcript

The sadist approaches Dilbert handing him a piece of paper and says, "You're invited to my four-hour meeting." As Dilbert reads the paper, the sadist says "There's no agenda. It's just supposed to hurt. Dilbert asks, "Any donuts?" The sadist replies, "Yes, but I'll drop one on the floor and hide it with the others. Dilbert then says, "I like those odds."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bait and switch, #first and third wives, #invited for drinks, #men vs women, #pretext, #tricked, #undertsand

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice approaches the Boss' desk and says, "A vendor invited me for drinks. It's the only time he has to talk about his product." The Boss says, "He's using the old bait-lube-and-switch trick. That's how I met my first and third wives." Alice replies, "I don't understand." The Boss says, "That's why it works."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #reapir, #defective co workers, #paramoid, #invited to meetings, #fix her, #trade in, #liar, #moron, #whistler

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert carries Peri Noid over his shoulder towards a shop with a sign that reads, "Repair Defective Co-workers." Dilbert holds Peri up and says to The Garbageman, "She's paranoid about not being invited to meetings. Can you fix her?" The Garbageman replies, "Nope." Dilbert asks, "Can I trade her in?" The Garbageman responds, "Would you like a liar, a moron, or a whistler?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #internet & world wide web, #monsters, #turned feral, #engineers, #social life, #social skills, #few weeks, #wolfman, #howls at inetrnet

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Steer clear of Darryl. He turned feral. Asok: Feral? Dilbert: That's what happens when engineers don't get invited to meetings. Alice: Darryl's only social life was meetings. Dilbert: He didn't get to use his social skills for a few weeks, and apparently he lost them. Asok: Is it like he turned into a wolfman? Dilbert: Yes, except he's better at math. And he howls at the Internet, not the moon. Asok: Can we watch? Man: How-ooo can you blog that?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #still single, #shower, #recoup money, #wedding gifts, #baby showers, #bitter, #election hut, #registered

View Transcript

Transcript

"Wally, you're invited to a 'Still Single' shower in my honor." "I'm trying to recoup all the money I've blown on wedding gifts and baby showers." "Someone's feeling a little bitter today." "I have a pattern registered at 'Electron Hut'."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #saint dogbert, #priority matrix, #agenda

View Transcript

Transcript

"I invited Saint Dogbert to bludgeon anybody who strays from the agenda into something stupid." "That reminds me of the productization of our Tiger Team's priority matrix." "Actually, that was on the agenda." "Oops. Carry on."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #co-worker, #john smith, #watch, #television, #cable, #america's most wanted, #wedgies, #entire, #town, #person, #victims, #wedgied, #own, #homes, #show, #adjust, #picture, #exactly, #invite, #people

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Dogbert, this is my new co-worker, John Smith." The man with Dilbert says, "Yo." Dogbert says, "Yo." Dilbert says, "I invited him over to watch television. He doesn't have cable yet." Dilbert, Dogbert and John sit on the couch watching tv. The announcer says, "Next on 'America's Most Wanted.'" The host of the program says, "This man gave 'wedgies' to an entire town, one person at a time." There is a picture of John on the tv screen. The host continues, "The victims were wedgied in their own homes, usually while watching this show." John asks, "Can you lean over and adjust that picture?" Dilbert replies, "Sure." Dogbert says, "They don't even explain what a wedgie is." John reaches for Dilbert's pants. Dilbert's underwear has been pulled over his head. He tells Dogbert, "This is exactly why I don't invite people over more often."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #four hour meeting, #surrogate social life, #bring chips, #wish, #had a spine

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina stands behind Asok's desk and says, "You're invited to a four-hour meeting, Asok." Asok looks at the agenda and says, "Tina, it would seem that all of your meetings have no purpose other than to provide you with a surrogate social life." Tina asks, "Can you bring chips?" Asok says, "I wish, I wish, I wish I had a spine."