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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 16, 1991's comic on:


Tags #exercise, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #joined, #bowling, #league, #yikes, #lower middle class, #muscle, #little arm

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Dilbert arrives at home carrying a bowling ball in a case. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I joined a bowling league." Dogbert's ears fly up in surprise and he says, "Yikes! We've become lower middle-class!" Dilbert says, "Don't be ridiculous. Bowling is good exercise. I'm doing it to build muscle tone." At the bowling alley, Dilbert sees three men who have one huge arm and one little arm. One of the men says, "Hey! 'Little Arm.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #invented, #send, #vast, #amounts, #fiber, #optic, #cables, #application, #bells, #theorem, #showed, #molecule, #electron, #originally, #joined, #industry, #give, #bed

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Dilbert sits at the desk and Dogbert sits next to him. Dilbert says, "There . . . I think I've invented a way to send vast amounts of data without fiber optic cables." Dilbert continues, "It's a simple application of J. S. Bell's theorem. He showed that if you break up a molecule and change the spin of one electron, the spin of the other electrons originally joined will immediately change too, no matter where they are." Dilbert asks, "What do you think the fiber optic industry will give me for this." Dogbert replies, "A horse's head in your bed."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 18, 1997's comic on:


Tags #joined late, #dinosaur, #hiding behind furniture, #space

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Dilbert says, "For those who joined us late, this is Bob the Dinosaur. He lives with Dilbert and me." Bob says, "Hi." Dogbert says, "Dinosaurs aren't extinct, they're just hiding behind the furniture." Dinosaur Bob says, "This is Dawn, my mate, and little Rex." Rex waves. Dobbert says, "You'll notice that they use a lot of space and they aren't very relevent." Bob says, "I think Rex has my eyes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 02, 2011's comic on:


Tags #meetings, #standards meeting., #represent interests, #create standards, #mutually exclusive prefrences, #laughs

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Standards Meeting. Dogbert: Each of you has been chosen to represent the interests of your respective companies. As you know, the best way to create standards is to mash together a bunch of mutually exclusive preferences. I hope I'm not the only one who joined this group just for the laughs.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 03, 2011's comic on:


Tags #commerce, #optimism, #patents, #patent infringement, #google, #apple, #microsoft, #oracle, #nasa, #astroid, #life span of optimist, #technology

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Lawyer: Our newest product infringes patents from Google, Apple, Microsoft, and Oracle. They've joined forces and hired NASA to nudge an asteroid toward our headquarters. Boss: I think we can win this. Lawyer: I wonder what the average life span of an optimist is.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #flat earth, #society, #witness, #christopher columbus, #death, #conspiracy

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Dogbert sits at a desk looking at a flattened globe. Dilbert asks, "You joined the 'Flat Earth Society?'" Dogbert replies, "I believe the earth MUST be flat. There is no good evidence to support the so-called 'round earth theory.'" Dilbert says, "I think Christopher Columbus would disagree." Dogbert says, "How convenient that your best witness is long dead."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 08, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #dawn, #bob, #dinosaurs, #cult, #trucks, #questioning

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Dilbert sits at his desk. Dawn and Bob the Dinosaurs asks, "Uh . . . Dilbert, could we get your advice?" Bob says, "We just joined Dogbert's new cult." Dawn says, "And he ordered us to kill each other for questioning him." Dilbert says, "Hmm . . . Maybe you could just shove each other in front of trucks."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #scientist, #anti-defamation, #league, #negative, #stereotypes, #concentration, #media, #portrayed, #technical

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Dilbert stands in front of the mirror tying his tie and Dogbert sits on the bed watching him. Dilbert says, "I joined the 'Scientist Anti-Defamation League.'" Dogbert asks, "What's that?" Dilbert replies, "They fight against the negative stereotypes of technical people that are often portrayed in the media." Dilbert's tie is wrapped around his body, arms and head. Dilbert says, "You broke my concentration."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 24, 1991's comic on:


Tags #scientist, #dispel, #society, #notion, #male, #Women, #gender, #gender roles, #aerobic, #instructor

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Dilbert and several men sit in the audience. A man says, "At the 'Scientist Anti-Defamation League' we must dispel society's notion that scientists are always male." The speaker continues, "Unfortunately, our membership is totally male because all of you joined just to meet women. Any ideas?" One man says, "Maybe we could merge with the 'Aerobic Instructor Anti-Defamation League.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #genius, #iqs, #Dilbert, #network, #enhance, #career, #mensa, #expo

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dogbert asks, "You joined what?" Dilbert replies, "Mensa. It's a group of people with genius IQs." Dilbert continues, "I'm hoping it will be a good way to network and enhance my career." The garbage man says to Dilbert, "I heard you joined our Mensa group . . . I hope you can make it to the career expo."