Kicking Me Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

10 Results for Kicking Me

View 1 - 10 results for kicking me comic strips. Discover the best "Kicking Me" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #canine, #tax, #rebate, #bill, #passed, #congress, #bills, #author, #Dogbert, #kicking, #liberal, #ethical

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sit in his chair watching television. A newscaster says, "The Canine Tax Rebate bill was passed by Congress today." The reporter continues, "The bill's author, Mister Dogbert, successfully pinned the label 'Dog Kicking Liberal on all who opposed him." Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Was that ethical?" Dogbert replies as he writes on a pad of paper, "Tha-a-at's it. You're on the list."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #kicking me, #least valuables, #manager, #most valuable emplyees, #turnover, #increase turnover

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to the staff, "As a manager, it's my job to reduce the turnover of our most valuable employees..." The Boss continues, "...and to increase turnover of our least valuable employees." Wally screams, "Ow! For the jillionth time, who keeps kicking me?!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #career counseling, #mad about downsized, #involves punching, #kicking, #resume, #alice, #seeking job

View Transcript

Transcript

Career Counseling. Dogbert: "Apparently you're still mad about being downsized." "According to your resume, you're seeking a job that involves 'punching a short, stocky guy with pointy hair.'" "Is that the only job you'd consider?" Alice: "I also like kicking."

Kicking Brains Into The River

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Kicking Brains Into The River - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #surveillance, #photo, #evidence, #identity, #guilt, #proof

View Transcript

Transcript

Police Officer: You're under arrest for running a scam cryogenic investment firm. We have video footage of you kicking unfrozen brains into the river. Dogbert: That doesn't look like me. Police Officer: You were chanting your own name.

Punching Boss

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Punching Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #improvement, #money, #morale, #punching, #violence, #kicking, #ideas

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i'm looking for ideas to improve morale without spending money. alice: we could take turns punching you. boss yells: no punching! any other ideas? wally: did anyone suggest kicking?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #board room, #fire employees, #no employees, #task force, #competitors, #white rumps

View Transcript

Transcript

EXECUTIVE BOARD ROOM TED: our competitors are kicking our pasty white rumps. Ted: Im bringing in dogcart to fire employees until we're stronger than the competition. Man: How will the work get done with no employees? Ted: Id better form a test force to study that.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dog collar, #keep track, #employee slaves, #final humiliation, #cubicles, #gerbils, #rationalization, #mechanisms, #collar, #6 foot extension cord, #dog, #adapting, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Here's your employee locator device." "Sensors in the building will be able to track you at all times." "We'll know how many times you use the restroom and how long." "It's a dog collar...the final humiliation." "Once you got used to working in cubicles like gerbils, we knew anything was possible." "My conformance rationalization mechanisms are kicking in." "It's not so bad. A collar is simply an efficient design. Everyone is doing it." "It's not so bad." "It's powered by this six foot long extension cord."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rebooting computer, #kicks computer, #roof top, #feel better

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice is on the phone in front of her computer. The person on the phone says, "Try rebooting your computer." A furious Alice is seen on top of the office building, kicking her computer off the roof. Alice peers over the side of the building on the phone and says, "Thanks. I feel much better."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"My allergies are kicking up again." "GAAA!!!" "Good gravy, man! Do you have any idea what you've just done?!!" "Since you brought up the topic of health..." "When I was having my bones set, the doctor noticed that I have a detached colon." "My small intestines will eventually burrow up past my spleen and try to leave my body." "GAAA!!! HERE IT COMES!!!" gurgle "And don't get me started about my bunions."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wages, #salary, #secret, #anger, #compensation, #money, #unfair

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: You left a speadsheet with everyone salary in the copier. Boss: Oops. Catbert: By now, every employee has seen it. Boss: Should I be worried that it will lower morale? Catbert: No, I wouldn't worry about that. I would worry about heads exploding when they find out Wally has the highest pay in the department. Noise: Pow!!! Catbert: It's going to be a long week. Boss: Would you mind kicking that angry eyeball into the trash?