Laser Pointer Comic Strips
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34 Results for Laser Pointer
View 1 - 10 results for laser pointer comic strips. Discover the best "Laser Pointer" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday August 28,
1999
Tags #analyze data, #hostile takeover, #pattern, #laser pointer, #size head
Transcript
Dilbert pionts at an overhead projection and says, "Then if you.." A man interrupts and says, "...analyze the data." Dilbert thinks, "It's a hostile takeover of my presentation!" The man steps in front of Dilbert and says, "... you'll see a pattern." Dilbert sits on the couch at home in his robe eating ice cream. Dogbert says, "And you let him do it?" Dilbert says, "He had a laser ponter the size of your head."
Thursday December 30,
1999
Tags #concludes one hour course, #pick up diploma, #laser printer, #fill in name, #prestigious, #dont discuss
Transcript
Dogbert stands with his back to a blackboard where the following is written: "Be Boring, $=Good, Remember to embezzle!" Dogbert says while holding the pointer in his hand: "This concludes your one-hour executive MBA course." Dogbert points out to a printer with his pointer and says: "On your way out, pick up a diploma from the laser printer and fill in your name." Dogbert says: "Remember, your degree can be prestigious if none of you ever discuss what happened here."
Wednesday March 28,
2012
Tags #raise, #married with children, #new family, #benefit expenses, #laser like focus, #procreating
Transcript
Wally: Give me a raise or else I'll get married and have children. My new family would increase your benefit expenses and distract me from my laser-like focus on work. Boss: I will gladly pay extra to prevent you from procreating. Wally: Word it any way you like.
Monday September 20,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #presentation, #computer
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table in Dilbert's lab. Dilbert says, "I'm adjusting the pointer pen laser light for my presentation tomorrow." Dilbert says, "I'm boosting the power so it's easier to see. Watch it while I get the phone." Dogbert turns the power up and the pen glows. Dogbert says, "The aliens appear hostile, captain. Set phasers to full power!"
Wednesday September 22,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #pointer pen
Transcript
Dilbert arrives at home with burned clothes and clouds of smoke rising from his head. Dilbert asks, "Dogbert, do you know how my light pointer pen could have gotten set to maximum power?" Dogbert replies, "You never seem to grasp the humor in these situations. It's not as if you caused any permanent damage in the office." Dilbert says, "Actually, I wasted a temp named Carl in the next office." Dogbert says, "A temp - my point exactly."
Friday April 21,
1995
Tags #lots howard, #cubicle neigborr, #immortal soul, #laser printer, #dogbert doesn't care
Transcript
Wally says to Dilbert, "Allow me to introduce Loud Howard." Howard, a man with a huge mouth, shouts, "Hi!" Wally says, "I will make Loud Howard your cubicle neighbor in the new office unless you give me your immortal soul!!" Howard shouts, "Nice day!" Back at home, Dilbert and Dogbert lie on the couch. Dilbert says, ". . . Fortunately I convinced him to take my laser printer instead . . ." Trying to read a book, Dogbert says, "What did I say that sounded like 'Tell me about your day?'"
Saturday January 13,
1996
Tags #shared laser printer, #apollo space mission, #wally invented cursor
Transcript
Wally presses a button on his keyboard and thinks, "Gotta hurry. One . . . two . . . three . . ." Wally runs out of his cubicle and thinks, "I have twelve seconds to get to the shared laser printed." As Wally peers around the corner, Alice and Dilbert stand at the printer reading copies of Wally's resume. Alice says, "Guess who saved the Apollo 13 space mission." Dilbert says, "Did you know that Wally invented the cursor?"
Friday December 19,
1997
Tags #project, #little snag, #north elbonian contractor, #military technology, #belligerent homelenad, #huge laser, #vaporize, #contract employees, #building workshop
Transcript
In a meetin, Dilbert says, "My project has hit a little snag." Dilbert says, "Our North Elbonian contracts stole our military technology for their belligerent homeland. They're building a huge laser to vaporize us." Alice's eyes bulge out. The Boss says, "Next year, remind me to include contract employees in the team-building workshop." Alice says, "The floor is warm!"
Saturday December 20,
1997
Tags #military technology, #huge laser, #create user manual, #sing helen reddy song
Transcript
Dilbert says, ",,,The North Elbonians stole our military technology. We think they're building a huge laser to use against us." Dogbert says, "Ask Tina the Tech Writer to create a user manual for them. Remind Tina how the North Elbonians treat women." Caption: Later in North Elbonia. The Elbonians line up in front of the barrel of a large laser gun. The guy in front reads "Okay... the timer is set... we're lined up in single file.. now we sing a Helen Reddy song."
Sunday September 11,
1994
Tags #copier paper, #laser printer, #made mockery, #phil, #prince of inssufficient light, #punishment, #tracked speatrely, #borrowing paper
Transcript
"Copy Room" "Stop right there!" "It's Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light." "What's in your hands?" "I'm just borrowing some paper for the laser printer. There's no law against that!" "I think we both know that the copier paper and the printer paper are purchased and tracked separately." "You've made a mockery of the system! I darn you to heck!" "Your punishment is to sit at the secretary's cubicle and endure the stale wit of your co-workers." "Hey, Wendy, there's something different about you today!"