Last Day Of Work Comic Strips
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1000 Results for Last Day Of Work
View 1 - 10 results for last day of work comic strips. Discover the best "Last Day Of Work" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday June 18,
2014
Tags #obstinacy, #prove wrong, #never work, #reflex, #worst idea, #last day of life, #jump off roof
Transcript
Jeff had to prove everyone wrong. That will never work. It was like a reflex. He couldn't stop. That's the worst idea I have ever heard. This was his last day of life. Alice: You can't jump off the roof right now. Jeff: Uh-oh.
Wednesday September 03,
2014
Tags #apathy, #dangerously incompetent, #last day of work, #lazy, #software, #tell everyone, #train, #unwarranted confidence, #engineering
Transcript
Coworker: This is my last day of work, so I won't have time to completely train you on the software. But I can show you enough to give you unwarranted confidence, when you should be feeling dangerously incompetent. Dilbert: That sounds worse than doing nothing. Coworker: Before I leave, I'll tell everyone you're lazy.
Friday November 03,
2000
Tags #last day, #farewells, #working, #row, #stay in touch, #stranger
Transcript
Ted, who has the letter 'R' painted on his chest, says to Wally, "Today is my last day. I'm saying my farewells." Wally looks at Ted as Ted says, "We've never talked, but I was working my way down the row and here you are." Ted says, "So... Let's stay in touch." Wally says, "Don't be a stranger."
Tuesday January 08,
2002
Tags #downsized, #info, #last day, #projects, #right away, #soon enough, #90 days
Transcript
The Boss hands Dilbert a stack of papers and says, "Here are some projects to finish before your last day." Dilbert responds, "But.. I'll have to interact with people who know I've been downsized." The Boss replies, "Hee Hee!" A coworker mocks Dilbert, "I'll get this information to you right away. Is ninety days soon enough?"
Wednesday January 02,
2008
Tags #day off, #empty office, #holiday, #loser, #new years day, #work, #worked
Transcript
Tina: What did you do for New Year's Day? Dilbert: I forgot it was a holiday and came to work for ten hours." Tina: That's sort of loserish. Dilbert: Thanks for labeling it.
Tuesday October 06,
2020
Height Advantage
Tags #company, #employement, #fired, #height, #hiring, #managers & supervisors, #pay cut, #short, #tall, #video conferencing, #zoom
Transcript
boss video conferencing with carl: carl, i hired you because you are tall, but now it doesn't matter because everyone looks the same height on zoom. your height advantage has disappeared, so today will be your last day with the company. carl: maybe instead you could cut my pay to the same level as short people. boss: that just might work.
Thursday November 23,
1995
Tags #ousource, #functions, #knowing, #not good ta
Transcript
The Boss, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "The company has decided to outsource all of the functions that we're not any good at." Dilbert, Wally and Alice throw their arms up in excitement and shout, "Yippee! Yay!" Wally asks the Boss, "When's your last day?" Alice points at him and says, "Uh-oh . . . They're not good at knowing what they're not good at . . ."
Sunday November 28,
2010
Tags #meeting, #pep talk, #ceo, #angry, #silent, #worry, #front, #motivation, #dumb, #hate, #bosses, #business
Transcript
The CEO pep talk CEO says, "I want to know I can count on every one of you!" CEO says, "What's wrong with these people?" Dilbert says, "Well? I fired that guy this morning. His last day is tomorrow." Boss says, "That one retires at the end of the month." The Boss says, "Those three are contractors. I didn't renew their contracts." The Boss says, "The rest of them believe that motivation is how the powerful steal from the dumb." CEO says, "Tell them I hate their guts." The Boss says, "I did that in the pre-meeting."
Friday June 08,
2018
Good Day At Work
Tags #work, #morale, #engagment, #boredom, #anger, #frustration
Transcript
Dogbert: How's work? Dilbert: On a good day, the frustration and anger solve for the boredom. Dogbert: What's a bad day like? Dilbert: Same as a good day but with more questions.
Thursday October 18,
2018
You Have To Work Hard To Succeed
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #Wally, #work, #hard, #single, #day, #years, #succeed, #topic
Transcript
The Boss: If you want to succeed, you have to work hard every single day for years. Dilbert: That sounds awful. You just talked me out of wanting to succeed. Did you work that hard to get where you are? The Boss: Next topic!