Lawn Mower Comic Strips
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20 Results for Lawn Mower
View 1 - 10 results for lawn mower comic strips. Discover the best "Lawn Mower" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday March 26,
2021
Shelves Are Ugly
Tags #business, #technology, #video call, #background, #attractive, #shelf, #lawn mower, #gym, #human, #decency, #rude, #laptop
Transcript
Dilbert on video call. voice from laptop: what's that behind you on the shelf? can't you make your background more attractive? dilbert: if we're being that way, who cuts your hair? your lawn mower? voice from laptop: did your gym go out of business? dilbert: i already miss our last shred of human decency.
Friday August 09,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #temperature, #internal, #organs, #compared, #bout, #bubonic, #plague, #repaired, #mower, #co-worker
Transcript
Dilbert and three men sit at a table eating lunch. A man says, "Yeah . . . I had a temperature of 147 degrees and they had to remove my internal organs." Another man says, "Well, that's nothing compared to my bout with bubonic plague last week." A man with no head asks, "Did I ever tell you about the time I repaired my own lawn mower?" Another man thinks, "Not again."
Wednesday May 23,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #witch, #practicing, #awful, #lawn ornaments, #tacky, #lawn
Transcript
Dilbert sits at a restaurant table with a woman. The woman says, "Thanks for asking me out. Most guys get scared when they find out I'm a practicing witch." The woman continues, "Then they say something I don't like and I end up turning them into lawn ornaments." Dilbert replies, "That's awful!" The woman says, "Tell me about it . . . you can't believe how tacky my lawn is now."
Friday August 16,
1991
Saturday January 14,
1995
Tags #dogbert venture capitalist, #invest 5 million, #agree, #standard conditions, #chairman of board, #mow lawn, #wash car, #touch bargainer, #multimedia developers, #gardening needs
Transcript
Dogbert sits at his desk and a businessman sits across from him. Reading from a document, Dogbert says, "I'll invest up to five million dollars if you'll agree to some standard conditions." Dogbert continues, "I will be chairman of the board and own 99% of the company. You will work for free and wash my car twice a week." The businessman asks, "Can I mow your lawn instead of washing your car?" Dogbert answers, "You're a tough bargainer, but I prefer multimedia developers for my gardening needs."
Thursday April 06,
1995
Tags #attractive incentives, #elbonia, #zero taxes, #cheerful, #leave labor, #environmental regulations, #best you can do, #lawn ornament
Transcript
The Boss, Dogbert and an Elbonian sit around a conference table. The Elbonian says, "We're offering attractive incentives to companies that move to Elbonia." The Elbonian continues, "Zero taxes, cheerful slave labor, amnesty from any inconvenient laws, and absolutely no environmental regulations!" The Boss asks, "Is that the best you can do?" The Elbonian hands a baby across the table and says, "Here, use my first born son as a lawn ornament."
Friday October 03,
1997
Tags #mob, #stupid people, #attack dogbert, #drink hose water, #isn't working, #grass, #attack, #ruin our lawn, #spraying water, #hose fight
Transcript
CAption: A mob of stupid people attack Dogbert's house. One in-duh-vidual says, "Our plan to drink all of his hose water isn't working." Another in-duh-vidual has a garden hose in his mouth and looks as if he is about to burst. The first in-duh-vidual says, "Hey, careful! You're getting water all over the grass..." Another person says, "Wait, that gives me an idea!" Dilbert reads the newspaper. "How's the attack going?" Dogbert replies, "They tried to ruin our lawn by spraying water on it. But now it's turned into a hose fight."
Saturday October 25,
1997
Tags #seeing beautiful woman, #curtains, #venetian blinds, #lawn chair in yard
Transcript
Wally says to Dilbert, "I've been seeing a beautiful woman. But something came between us." Dilbert says, "Her curtains?" Wally says, "Venetian blinds. Totally unforgiving." Dilbert says, "Maybe she got spooked when you put the lawn chair in her yard."
Friday February 05,
1999
Tags #doctor dogbert, #herbal therapy, #eat lawn, #storm gutters, #hair grow back, #perscription
Transcript
Caption: "Doctor Dogbert" Dogbert wears a crown and stethoscope. A bald man in black socks and boxers sits on the examining table. Dogbert says, "I'm putting you on extreme herbal therapy." Dogbert writes a prescription and says, "Come to my house once a week and eat my lawn down to one inch." The man gets dressed. Dogbert says, "After six months, if your hair doesn't grow back, I have more herbs in my storm gutters."
Friday August 02,
2002
Tags #budget cuts, #customer service, #pranks calls to elderly, #neighbor, #treasure buried, #under lawn
Transcript
Dilbert reports to The Boss, "Our budget cuts are affecting customer service." The Boss asks, "How much?" Dilbert continues, "Our customer service center spends all day making prank calls to the elderly." A customer service representative says into the phone, "According to our records, your neighbor has treasure buried under his lawn."