Lazy And Dumb Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

274 Results for Lazy And Dumb

View 1 - 10 results for lazy and dumb comic strips. Discover the best "Lazy And Dumb" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 21, 1999's comic on:

Tags #big dumb guy, #disagree, #lazy, #habitual liar, #excellent track record, #excellent work

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss brings a Big Dumb Guy to Alice's desk. He says, "Alice, I'd like you to work with this big dumb guy." The Boss continues, "He doesn't know he's dumb. So he'll tell people you're dumb if you ever disagree." The Boss: "He's also lazy and a habitual liar." Alice shouts, "Then why do you let him work here?!" The Boss explains, "He has an excellent track record. No one knows why." In front of the Boss and Alice, the Big Dumb Guy bends over and picks up the document that Alice was working on from her desk. Big Dumb Guy shows Alice's document to the Boss. Big Dumb Guy says, "Look what I just did." The Boss responds, "Excellent work." Alice is flabbergasted. The Boss tries to console Alice, who is furious, with "Remember Alice, you're never too old to learn."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 30, 2014's comic on:

Tags #executives, #how-to, #snobbishness, #book on success, #hard work, #wise decisions, #being lucky, #lazy and dumb

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I need you to co-author a book on success with me. The goal is to make readers believe success comes from hard work and wise decisions. So instead of hating me for being lucky, they will hate themselves for being lazy and dumb. Dogbert: And for buying your book?

Ted Is Not That Dumb

Thank you for voting.
Ted Is Not That Dumb - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2016's comic on:

Tags #joke, #mean, #bully, #insult, #death, #idiot, #idiocy, #stupid, #dumb, #guest artist, #brenna thummler, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You're not allowed to tell co-workers to drive into a ravine. Dilbert: It was a joke. Ted isn't so dumb that he would do it. Ask him if he's that dumb. Boss: Don't speak ill of the dead.

Too Dumb To Understand

Thank you for voting.
Too Dumb To Understand - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 21, 2016's comic on:

Tags #intelligence, #perspective, #dumb, #social media, #comment, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can't believe how stupid this person is. Dilbert: How do you rule out the hypothesis that you're too dumb to understand his point? Take your time. I can wait. Boss: For starters, he disagrees with me.

Dumb Question

Thank you for voting.
Dumb Question - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 20, 2018's comic on:

Tags #engineers, #questioning, #dumb question, #stupidity, #jargon, #language, #lingo

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm not an engineer, so this might be a dumb question. But why can't we 3-D print a blockchain and HTML it into a bitcoin? Dilbert: Alice can answer that. Alice: I quit.

Dilbert Characters

Everyone Else Is Lazy And Useless

Thank you for voting.
Everyone Else Is Lazy And Useless - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 16, 2018's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #team, #meeting, #lazy, #useless, #propose, #marinate, #bile, #raise, #hands, #grunt

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Everyone on this team except me is lazy and useless. I propose that I do all of the work for the team. While the rest of you marinate in your own bile. All in

Saying You Are Dumb

Thank you for voting.
Saying You Are Dumb - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #job, #change, #technology, #dumb, #imply, #product

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert's tech support ted: i can't figure out how to use your product. what should i do? dogbert: i recommend changing jobs to something less challenging. ted: are you saying i'm dumb? dogbert's once from phone: no. no. no. i'm only implying it.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 03, 2011's comic on:

Tags #executives, #interviews, #ceo's interview series, #company priftable, #credit, #overpaid and useless, #dumb employees, #highest bidder, #blackmail, #interview

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "I don't like people." Dogbert says, "What makes your company so profitable?" CEO says, "I give all of the credit to our fine employees." Dogbert says, "Is that another way of saying you're overpaid and useless?" CEO says, "Um... no. I'm their leader. I set the direction." Dogbert says, "Because the employees are too dumb to set their own direction?" CEO says, "No! They're smart!" Dogbert says, "But not as smart as you?" CEO says, "Who's going to see this?" Dogbert says, "No one, assuming you're the highest bidder." Dogbert's CEO Interview Series

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 13, 2011's comic on:

Tags #cruelty, #deception, #ignorance (knowledge), #helicopter from kit, #link to website, #too dumb, #pliers

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: You should build your own helicopter from a kit. I'll send you a link to the website. It's only dangerous for people who are too dumb to know how dumb they are. Boss: Is it as easy as it sounds? I have pliers. Carol: Yes!

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 2011's comic on:

Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #interviews, #managers, #dumb decions, #particpate

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I'm doing a study to find out which managers make dumb decisions. Would you like to participate? Boss: I don't see why not. Dogbert: And we're done.