Legacy Sytems Comic Strips
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18 Results for Legacy Sytems
View 1 - 10 results for legacy sytems comic strips. Discover the best "Legacy Sytems" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday June 03,
2012
Tags #laziness, #office workers, #encouragement, #career plans, #misjudge, #5 year plan, #legacy sytems, #retirement, #projects, #protect heart, #plenty of naps, #quality of work, #pension fund, #new career plan
Transcript
Catbert: Wally, you can't float through life with no goals and no ambition. Wally: You misjudge me. I have my entire career planned out. My five-year plan is to avoid any sort of work in which my individual accomplishments can be measured. I'll hoard knowledge about one of our legacy systems so I seem indispensable. When I get to within four years of retirement, I'll only work on projects that have a five-year payback. I'll protect my cardiovascular system by getting plenty of naps and not caring about the quality of my work. Then I'll stick a straw in our pension fund and suck on it for the next forty years. Boss: Did you get him straightened out? Catbert: No, but I got a new career plan for myself.
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Monday December 15,
2008
Tags #boss, #office workers, #legacy sytems, #biggest rind, #compost heap, #bacteria
Transcript
The boss: How would you like to be in charge of legacy systems? Dilbert: That's like being the biggest rind in the compost heap. The boss: Do it anyways. Dilbert: I surrender to the bacteria.
Monday February 20,
2017
Who Wants The Legacy System Job
Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #legacy, #underachiever, #volunteer
Transcript
Boss: I'm assigning our best and brightest engineers to the new system integration team. Anyone who is left over gets to be in charge of watching our legacy system slowly rot. Dilbert: Who would want that job? Wally: Me!!! Pick me!!!
Tuesday February 21,
2017
Add Feature To Legacy System
Tags #legacy, #development, #change, #obstinacy, #engineers, #stalemate
Transcript
Man: Wally, I need you to add a feature to the legacy system while we wait for the new software to go live. Wally: My job is to prevent people such as you from adding features to our legacy system. Man: But it's my job to make you do it. Wally: One of us has a terrible job.
Tuesday August 15,
2017
Wally's Legacy System Report
Tags #legacy, #laziness, #deception
Transcript
Wally: Would you like me to tell you what I accomplished this week with our legacy system? Boss: No, because legacy systems are boring and I like to think about new things. Dilbert: I thought we replaced all of our legacy systems. Wally: Keep your thoughts to yourself.
Tuesday December 16,
2008
Tags #office workers, #valuable, #value, #legacy system, #less valuable, #never appear less valuable, #dress code troll
Transcript
Dilbert: I worry that being assigned to work on the legacy systems will make me appear less valuable in the future. Catbert: You have my word that you could never appear less valuable than you are now. Gilbert: Why do your assurances make me feel worse? Catbert: Your new dress code is "troll."
Thursday December 18,
2008
Tags #complain, #garbage, #job, #trash, #new assignment, #troll in charge, #legacy systems, #shouldn't complain, #economy, #free bag of garbage, #business
Transcript
Dilbert: My new assignment is "troll in charge of the legacy systems." I guess I shouldn't complain. I'm lucky to have a job in this economy. Garbageman: Would a free bag of garbage make you feel better? Dilbert: A little.
Saturday September 21,
2013
Tags #computer programmers, #managers & supervisors, #obliviousness, #code consistency, #legacy systems, #business
Transcript
Dilbert: What's your take on code consistency versus best practices for legacy systems? Boss; I want all of that stuff and I want it now. Dilbert: When people ask what you do for a living, what the $%@* do you say?
Tuesday March 29,
2016
Asok's Legacy
Tags #judge, #judging, #overshare, #sharing, #socks, #guest artist, #donna oatney, #legal
Transcript
CEO: Do you ever worry about your legacy? Asok: I worry about someone finding out my socks are so worn out that all I have left are the ankle parts. CEO: Well, that's enough about you.
Wednesday February 22,
2017
How Long For New Feature
Tags #laziness, #excuse, #legacy, #deception, #engineer, #programmer, #engineering
Transcript
Tina: How long would it take to add that feature to the legacy system? Wally: That depends. When will the new system replace the legacy system? Tina: In six months. Wally: The new feature would take seven months.