Lifestyle Comic Strips
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19 Results for Lifestyle
View 1 - 10 results for lifestyle comic strips. Discover the best "Lifestyle" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday January 31,
2012
Tags computers & peripherals, inventions, computers, program themsleves, machine intelligence, destroy civilization, plan a, live unhealthy, lifestyle, plan b, techno terrorism
Transcript
Dilbert: In a few years, computers will program themselves. That's called singularity. From that point on, machine intelligence will increase exponentially. The resulting shock will probably destroy the fabric of civilization. Plan "A" is to live an unhealthy lifestyle. Plan "B" is techno-terrorism. Boss: I like the first one.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday July 18,
1991
Tags ratbert, journal, chiuahua, lifestyle, movie, senseless, brutality, slapped, strangely, satisfying
Transcript
Ratbert sits on a rock writing in his journal. Ratbert writes, "Day one: I have disguised myself as a Chihuahua so I can experience their lifestyle and make a movie." Ratbert writes, "I have already seen the senseless prejudice and brutality against an innocent Chihuahua." Ratbert writes, "This morning I slapped myself with a rolled up newspaper for no apparent reason. It was strangely satisfying."
Thursday May 21,
1998
Tags hideous sycophant, no hope, career advancement, lifestyle choice
Transcript
Dilbert and Allen walking down a hall. Dilbert asks, "So, Allen, what's it like to be a hideous sycophant?" Allen replies, "It's okay." Allen asks, "What's it like to have no hope of career advancement?" Dilbert responds, "Not bad." Allen and Dilbert sitting at table with food trays. Allen asks, "Were you born that way or is it a lifestyle choice?" Dilbert responds, "I'll ask my mom, but I think it was bad parenting."
Thursday June 12,
2003
Tags stay at home father, love children, rewarding lifestyle, unpaid servant, could iron
Transcript
Alice and Bobby are out to dinner. Alice says, "If we married, would you mind being a stay-at-home father?" Bobby responds, "I love children. That would be a very rewarding lifestyle." Alice says, "Okay, now imagine that there aren't any kids, and you're basically my unpaid servant." Bobby asks, "Could I iron?"
Monday May 27,
2013
Tags animal costumes, big game hunting, costumes, furry lifestyle, go on safari, take a trip, like animals
Transcript
Boss: Carol, why did you send me a link about people who like to dress in animal costumes? Carol: It's called the Furry Lifestyle. I thought you might want to try it out. Boss: I'll take a look. Dilbert: What's your end game? Carol: If the Furry thing sticks I'll try to get him to go on a safari.
Thursday December 19,
2013
Tags executives, rich people, wages, ceo lifestyle, yacht, penthouse, estate, priceless art, million dollar watch, money
Transcript
Dilbert: Hey, look! There's a story on the Internet about your fabulous CEO lifestyle. Here's a picture of your yacht, your penthouse in New York, your palatial estate, and your priceless art. CEO: This really isn't the time. Dilbert: Said the man with the million-dollar watch.
Sunday October 06,
2019
Lifestyle Disagreer
Tags argument, conversation, office workers, sarcasm, disagreement, attitude
Transcript
Man: I hear what you're saying, and I disagree. Dilbert: Because...? Man: Because what? Dilbert: Do you have any reasons for your disagreement? Man: No, I'm a lifestyle disagreer. I disagree with everyone all the time. The reasons are irrelevant. Dilbert: You sound smart. Man: No. I'm not smart. Dilbert: And you're attractive too. Man: No. I'm ugl...okay, I see what you're doing.
Sunday February 13,
1994
Tags insensitive, Dogbert, dog bashing, born this way, no campassion, feel bad, who cares?, insensitive about insensitivity
Transcript
"That joke was not funny. You're insensitive, Dogbert." "Well, here we go with the 'insensitive dog bashing'." "Is it my fault I was born without the ability to sense the feelings of others?" "Oh, sure, I wish I could be like you." "Somehow you know exactly what it feels like to a different gender, race, lifestyle or body." "But I'm insensitive. All I know is how I feel!! And I'm proud of it!" "But you'd understand that, if you weren't insensitive about insensitivity!!" "When you put it like that, I feel kinda bad." "Who cares?"
Saturday October 18,
2008
Tags philanthropist, eat for one day, opulent life, super models, stop giving, inspire, try harder
Transcript
Dogbert the Philanthropist Dogbert says, "If I give a man a fish, he will eat for one day." Dogbert says, "But if I inspire him by my opulent lifestyle and my squiring of supermodels, he might try harder." Dilbert says, "You can't stop giving." Dogbert says, "It's like a curse."
Wednesday January 14,
2009
Tags worried, nervousness, humor, laziness, occupation
Transcript
Dilbert says, "I'm tense because the company is downsizing and I have no project." Wally says, "Being worthless at work is only hard for the first ten years. After that it's a lifestyle." Dilbert says, "I didn't say I was worthless." Wally says, "Now you're making me nostalgic for my old denial phase."