Loan Shark Comic Strips
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Character
14 Results for Loan Shark
View 1 - 10 results for loan shark comic strips. Discover the best "Loan Shark" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday December 12,
2017
Dogbert The Loan Shark
Tags #loan, #loan shark, #money, #racket, #interest
Transcript
Boss: I need a loan to finance my professional gambling. Dogbert: That sounds like an excellent idea. I charge 40 percent interest per day, and I'll kill you for missing a payment. Boss: What's the catch? Dogbert: I'm also an identity thief.
Tuesday January 10,
2012
Tags #competition (psychology), #fish & aquatic mammals, #complaints, #shark, #doplphon, #robot, #patrol, #waters
Transcript
Boss: I'm hearing some complaints that you built a robot shark to patrol the soc-called territorial waters around your cubicle. Alice: It's a robot dolphin. I can see how people might be confused. I need you to smile more. Shark: Whatever.
Thursday August 22,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #high-risk, #investment, #bonds, #junk, #checking, #account, #ethel's, #savings, #loan
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert says, "I lost my fortune in a high-risk investment." Dilbert asks, "Junk bonds?" Dogbert covers his eyes and says, "Checking account at 'Ethel's Savings and Loan!'"
Tuesday July 13,
1999
Tags #all the copies, #bestseller, #house as colleral, #dump, #pay back, #dogbert gets loan
Transcript
Caption: "Dogbert gets a loan" Dogbert sits across the desk from a bank executive. Dogbert wags his tail and says, "I plan to buy all the copies of hte book I authored, thus making it a bestseller." Dogbert says, "And I'd like to use your house as collateral. Unless it's a dump." The banker says, "How are you planning to pay us back?" dogbert says, "Do you take books?"
Wednesday July 24,
2002
Tags #bailout loan, #excellent lobbyists, #taxpayers give money, #leagl
Transcript
The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "The government is giving us a bailout loan because we have excellent lobbyists!" The Boss exclaims, "Ha ha! Taxpayers will give us money so we can build overpriced products to sell to taxpayers!" Dilbert turns to The Boss and says, "Remind me again why any of this is legal." The Boss replies, "Wuss."
Friday June 13,
2008
Tags #interest free loan, #paperwork, #snortling, #leverage is limited, #no snortling
Transcript
The Boss says, "I've decided that your tiny company will give us an interest-free loan." The Boss says, "There's no paperwork to sign. We'll just pay your invoices late while snortling." The Boss says, "This is the part where you realize your negotiating leverage is limited." A man, "I demand no snortling!"
Friday April 17,
2020
Rot From The Inside
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #work, #ethic, #abysmal, #loan, #project, #hate, #rot, #idea, #raise
Transcript
boss: wally, your work ethic is abysmal. you're fired. wally: wouldn't it make more sense to loan me to a project you hate, so i can rot it from the inside? boss: that's not your worst idea. wally: is a raise out of the question?
Wednesday March 13,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #japan, #favoite, #animals, #remember, #calisthenics, #shark
Transcript
The Boss approaches Wally and Dilbert carrying costumes. The Boss says, "On my recent business trip to Japan, I learned that Japanese workers dress as their favorite animals to boost productivity." Wally wears a beaver costume and Dilbert wears a dolphin costume. In Japan, a group of workers laugh as one man says, "Ooh-ooh . . . And remember the time we told them we all do calisthenics?!"
Friday March 07,
2003
Tags #loser magazine, #pen, #easy questions, #borrow pen, #chewer, #denied loan
Transcript
The reporter approaches Wally and says, "Wally, I'd like to interview you for 'Loser Magazine.'" Wally responds, "Okay." The reporter asks, "Do you have a pen?" Wally says, "Wow. These are easy questions." The reporter says, "I mean, may I borrow your pen?" Wally responds, "No, you look like a chewer."
Friday October 17,
2003
Tags #tunnel shark, #dig forever, #red button, #don't push button
Transcript
Dilbert: I call it the "Tunnel SHrk" It converts dirt and rock into energy and can dig forever. So whatever you do, don't ignore what Im saying and push the red button. The Boss: Button! Now whats gotten into you?