Loose Ends Comic Strips
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32 Results for Loose Ends
View 1 - 10 results for loose ends comic strips. Discover the best "Loose Ends" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday March 01,
1999
Tags #dense planets, #more garvity, #more dense planets, #no loose ends, #Dogbert
Transcript
Dilbert and dogbert walk outside. Dilbert says, "...And we know mass creates gravity because dense planets have more gravity." They stop, Dilbert sits on a rock. Dogbert says, "How do we know which planets are more dense?" Dilbert says, "They have more gravity." Dogbert says, "That's circular reasoning." Dilbert says, "I prefer to think of it as having no loose ends."
Saturday October 12,
2002
Tags #vacation, #starts ten minutes, #loose ends, #reporter, #designed computer, #recycled paper
Transcript
Dilbert is sitting in his cubicle. He thinks, "My vacation starts in ten minutes." Dilbert continues to think, "I tied up all of my loose ends. I only need to walk out the door." The Boss approaches and tells Dilbert, "I told a reporter that we designed a computer made entirely of recycled paper."
Monday April 16,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #yank, #loose threads, #cut, #better, #Lose, #head
Transcript
Dilbert looks at his shirt sleeve and thinks, "Loose thread." Dilbert grabs the thread and thinks, "I can't remember if it's better to cut these or just yank on them." Dilbert yanks the thread and his head collapses into his shirt.
Tuesday September 09,
1997
Tags #growing beard, #hide no chin, #loose sweaters, #no waist, #sherlock holmes outfir, #no clue, #mannnequins, #friends
Transcript
Wally is sitting with his tray of food at a table in the company cafeteria. Dilbert is about to sit down. Wally says, "I'm thinking of growing a beard to disguise the fact that I have no chin." Alice joins Wally and Dilbert at the table. Wally continues, "Then I'll get some loose sweaters to disguise the fact that I have no waist." Alice says, "Maybe you should get a Sherlock Holmes outfit to disguise the fact that you have no clue." Wally says, "Perhaps some mannequins as friends."
Wednesday December 03,
2003
Tags #break into subgroups, #net meeting, #usual time, #loose canon, #label, #hackneyed phrases, #cut now type
Transcript
wally: "I recommend that we break into subgroups to create a process for choosing our next meeting time." alice: "Or we could just meet next week at our usual time." wally: "You're a loose canon." Alice: "Stop labeling me with hackneyed phrases!" Wally: "You're a 'cut now, measure later' type."
Sunday October 14,
2001
Tags #meeting, #vague intrsutcions, #morons annonymous, #pandemonium, #ends, #shoe sniffing contest, #mom called, #arguments, #business
Transcript
The Boss approaches Carol and says, "Carol, if anyone calls, say I'm in a meeting." Carol asks, "What meeting?" The Boss replies, "It doesn't matter." Carol thinks, "#O!* vague instructions" as the phone rings. Carol says into the phone, "He's at his weekly meeting of 'Morons Anonymous.' She continues on the phone, "It's a long meeting. They usually get into an argument about the definition of 'anonymous.' She continues on the phone, "Half of them think it means 'angry.' Then someone throws a chair and it's pandemonium." She continues on the phone, "The whole thing usually ends with a shoe-sniffing contest." The Boss returns to Carol's desk. She says, "Your mom called."
Tuesday April 30,
2013
Tags #comic ends early, #embedded punchline, #follow passion, #joking, #made fat, #set up, #blank frame, #sight gag
Transcript
Asok: I tried to follow my passion but it only made me fat. Dogbert: This comic ends early because some idiot embedded the punch line in the setup. Message to Readers
Friday January 13,
2012
Tags #business failures/bankruptcies, #saving & investment, #raises, #debt crisis, #economic uncertainty, #board of directors, #stock options, #money
Transcript
Boss: I can't give you a raise because the Elbonian debt crisis has created economic uncertainty. Luckily for us, our board of directors granted our CEO more stock options so he won't leave during uncertain times. Dilbert: What happens when the uncertainty ends? Boss: Then he'll exercise stock options.
Sunday January 08,
2012
Tags #appearences, #big cubicle, #loose weight, #project leader, #status system, #toilet paper holder, #wider cubicle
Transcript
Boss: Congratulations! I'm naming you project leader. As such, you are entitled to a cubicle that is three inches wider than standard. Dilbert: I like the one I have. Boss: You don't have a choice. It is critical that we maintain the integrity of the status system. Otherwise our CEO will look like a jerk for having a private bathroom with a trained falcon as a toilet paper holder. Dilbert: Fine. Where's my larger cubicle? Boss: Here's the awkward part. We don't have one. I need you to lose weight until it looks as if your cubicle is larger. Dilbert: And if I don't? Boss: The falcon needs an assistant.
Tuesday April 17,
1990
Tags #shirt, #head, #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #Family, #portrait, #torso
Transcript
Dilbert, who has no head, walks up to Dogbert and asks, "Dogbert, could you give me a hand?" Dogbert says, "Paw." Dilbert points to his missing head and explains, "I pulled a loose thread on my shirt and my head got sucked into my torso." Dilbert asks, "What should we do?" Dogbert replies, "This might be a good time for a family portrait."