Made Distracted Comic Strips
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329 Results for Made Distracted
View 1 - 10 results for made distracted comic strips. Discover the best "Made Distracted" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday July 31,
2005
Tags #alice, #boss, #car call, #diustarcted, #made distracted, #driving, #crashed
Transcript
Rrring! Alice : Now what? This is alice. Jo its your boss. alice: GAAA! its a car call. he's using me toenetratin himself while he's sitting in traffic Boss: How everything? Alice: I'll lose and hour of my life if I don't get him off the phone, Boss: Nice weather today. Alice: Do me a favor and look in your brief case to see if my latest report is there. The boss: Okay. The boss: and turn down your radio so Ic an hear you...and check your calendar on you pda GAA!!! CRASH! IM going to hell.
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Tuesday August 23,
2011
Tags #commerce, #fraternization, #creepy new vendor, #did laundry, #creepy, #made sandwhiches
Transcript
Dilbert: Our new vendor is creepy. He's trying to form a relationship with me. Man: I went to your house and did your laundry. You're welcome. Wally: How creepy could it be? Man: I made us sandwiches. You're out of mayo.
Thursday October 20,
2011
Tags #commerce, #credit, #forbidden knowledge, #change to dotted lines, #made of ink
Transcript
Boss: Change all of the lines to dotted. We're not made of ink. Dilbert: Why'd I just get chills? Boss: Me too. It feels like some sort of forbidden knowledge.
Saturday May 07,
1994
Tags #boss made pass, #cat ate ring, #family in coma, #irs audit, #seek relief, #woes, #anti woe cologne
Transcript
Alice: I'm going to seek relief from my many woes by sharing them with you. My entire family is in a coma....The cat ate my wedding ring,,,,The IRS is auditing us....my boss made a pass at me. It isn't working, you aren't absorbing my woes. Dilbert: Im wearing into woe cologne.
Wednesday September 07,
1994
Tags #bungee boss, #incoming, #made a difference, #mentor, #sprong!, #bouncing bungee
Transcript
The Boss: We'll be getting a new "Bungee Boss" sometime today. Hi - Im -your- new- boss- lets- change- every- thing- beef- I- get- reassigned- pops- too- late- goodbye. sproing wally: He was like a mentor to me. Dilbert: I think he made a difference. The Boss: Incoming!
Friday November 01,
1996
Tags #alice crazy, #can't complain, #screen saver, #wally clipping nails, #made recording, #alice, #wally annoying sounds
Transcript
Alice sits at her desk listening to sounds coming over the cubicle wall. She clenches her teeth and thinks, "Oh, no . . . It's the maddening sound of Wally clipping his nails." Alice thinks, "The sound makes me crazy, but I can't complain because it would sound silly. Must . . . Wait . . ." Dilbert stands behind Wally and asks, "You made your own screen saver?" Wally replies, "It's called 'Wally's 101 Annoying Cubicle Sounds.'" The sound of slurping comes from his computer.
Wednesday December 25,
1996
Tags #decoy suitcase, #airline distracted, #lose decoy, #sneak, #emergency carry on, #eat their food
Transcript
Dogbert sits on the dresser watching Dilbert pack. Dilbert closes a suitcase and tells Dogbert, "This suitcase is the decoy." Dilbert explains, "While the airline is distracted trying to lose the decoy, I'll sneak aboard with this emergency carry-on bag." Dogbert asks, "What if they try to make you eat their food?" Dogbert replies, "Fake vomit. They'll think I already ate."
Friday October 23,
1998
Tags #new hire, #not working, #no head, #headless man, #made mistake hiring, #fired, #insubordination
Transcript
Dilbert walks up to the Boss. Dilbert guides the headless man by the collar. Dilbert says, "The new guy isn't working out." The Boss says, "Why not?" Dilbert says, "Maybe because he has no head." The Boss frowns. The Boss says,"So, you think that I made a mistake hiring him?" Dilbert says, "Um... no. But the new guy thinks so." The boss shakes his fists. The Boss says, "Then he's fired for insubordination."
Sunday September 11,
1994
Tags #copier paper, #laser printer, #made mockery, #phil, #prince of inssufficient light, #punishment, #tracked speatrely, #borrowing paper
Transcript
"Copy Room" "Stop right there!" "It's Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light." "What's in your hands?" "I'm just borrowing some paper for the laser printer. There's no law against that!" "I think we both know that the copier paper and the printer paper are purchased and tracked separately." "You've made a mockery of the system! I darn you to heck!" "Your punishment is to sit at the secretary's cubicle and endure the stale wit of your co-workers." "Hey, Wendy, there's something different about you today!"
Sunday September 03,
1995
Tags #laptop, #freezing up, #telecommuting, #distracted at home, #virtual cubcile, #invisible walls, #cone of prodcutivity, #dedicated, #cone, #focused, #corporate vision, #firm commitment, #work at hime, #victory
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk in his bathrobe. Dogbert says, "My laptop PC keeps freezing up. Come take a look at it." Dilbert replies, "I'm telecommuting, Dogbert. I can't be distracted by home projects." Dilbert says, "Don't come another step closer. This is my virtual cubicle, within which I can not be disturbed." Dilbert spreads his arms and continues, "These invisible walls form a cone of productivity around me." Dilbert continues, "Within this zone I am a dedicated employee, totally focused on the corporate vision." Dilbert continues, "Nothing can distract me from my firm commitment to the work-at-home principle." Dogbert says, "Fine. I think I'll set the couch on fire." Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table working on a laptop. Dogbert says, "Another victory for the distractor!" Dilbert says, "I swear, someday principle will win!"