Management Problems Comic Strips

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527 Results for Management Problems

View 1 - 10 results for management problems comic strips. Discover the best "Management Problems" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #management problems, #solve by yelling, #buying software

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Dogbert: There are two kinds of management problems. "There's the kind you can solve by yelling and the kind you can solve by buying some sort of software." "That's why I created 'Some sort of software that yells'." The boss: "Ooo!!!"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #layer of management, #meeting disaster, #senior management, #warning the layer above, #dont mention problems

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Alice sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Don't mention any problems when you do your presentation to senior management, Alice." The Boss continues, "They might try to solve the problems during the meeting. That would be a disaster." Alice tells Dilbert, "As far as I can tell, every layer of management exists for the sole purpose of warning us about the layer above." Dilbert akss, "Are you saying they have a purpose?"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #casual dress day, #hurting productivity, #need to cancel, #real problems, #irrational management, #comfortable plants

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The Boss says to Catbert, "Casual Dress Day is hurting our productivity. We need to cancel it." Catbert says, "Is it possible that our real problems are caused by irrational management?" The Boss says, "No, I think comfortable pants are the problem." Catbert says, "Sounds right."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #the boss, #consultant, #management

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Dogbert stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk and says, "I'm a 'blame consultant.'" The Boss thinks, "I've seen him before." Dogbert explains, "For a large fee I will tell the workers that the problems in the company are THEIR fault, not yours. It's the latest management fad." The Boss asks, "Won't they see right through that?" Dogbert asks, "Is that MY fault??!"

I Need Solutions Not Unexpected Problems

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I Need Solutions Not Unexpected Problems - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #authority, #convincing, #managers, #managers & supervisors, #launch deadline, #solutions, #unexpected problems, #business

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Boss: Are you going to meet the launch deadline? Dilbert: No. There were unexpected problems. Boss: I need solutions, not unexpected problems! Did that mean anything? Dilbert: Almost. Good try.

Management Fast Track

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Management Fast Track - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #talent, #management, #potential, #frustration

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Boss: Dilbert, our CEO asked me to put you on the management fast track. Dilbert: Why does he hate me so much? Boss: He didn't say, but I have a lot of guesses if you want to hear them.

Groomed For Management

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Groomed For Management - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #back-stabbing, #management, #betrayal, #double cross

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Dilbert: My boss is trying to groom me for management. How can I get out of it? Wally: Tell him that as soon as you are sufficiently groomed you will stab him in the back and take his job. Dilbert: ...and then I'll take your job. Boss: I'm moving you to the advanced management class.

Unforseen Problems

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Unforseen Problems - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #building apps, #completion date, #problems, #unforseen

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Dilbert: It will take four weeks to build the app, unless there are unforeseen problems. how often do we have unforeseen problems? Dilbert: One hundred percent of the time. Then whats the point of estimating a completion date? Dilbert: I was hoping to make you stop talking but t dint work.

Dogbert's Time Management Book

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Dogbert's Time Management Book - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #time, #management, #time management, #blank

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Dogbert: Would you like to read my book on time management? Dilbert: Yes. These pages are blank. Dogbert: I just saved you three hours.

Anticipate Problems

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Anticipate Problems - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #anticipate, #finishing, #friday, #punctual, #anticipating, #things, #problems

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Man: Do you anticipate any problems finishing by Friday? Wally: I do not. Man: Is that because you're punctual or because you aren't good at anticipating things? Wally: I don't foresee any unforeseen problems. Man: Okay. Wait...