Mandatory Online Training Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

241 Results for Mandatory Online Training

View 1 - 10 results for mandatory online training comic strips. Discover the best "Mandatory Online Training" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mergers & acquisitions, #start up, #45 hours, #mandatory online training, #seven customers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We got Randy by buying his start-up. Randy, Dilbert will show you how to access our 45 hours of mandatory online training. Randy: I quit. Boss: Well, at least we still have his start-up. Dilbert: And all seven of its customers, too.

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mandatory online training, #system crashed, #retake training

View Transcript

Transcript

"You're the only one who hasn't finished the mandatory online six sigma training." "I finished it, but the system crashed before it stored my data." "This is when you say, 'There's no need to retake the training. I'll just check off your name.'" "Are you new on this planet?"

Online Class Muted

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Online Class Muted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #technology, #online, #training, #diversity, #inclusion, #mute, #course, #confess, #idiots

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: my records show you completed the online training for diversity and inclusion. apparently, you did not know we can detect it when you have the sound muted during the entire course. colleague: oops. dilbert: you can do that? Boss: no, but i can trick most of you idiots into confessing.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #self paced, #online training, #sharpen my saw, #subject, #don't know subject, #confusing

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Wally and Dilbert sit together at a table. Wally says to the Boss, "I've been taking a self-paced online training course to sharpen my saw". The Boss replies, "What's the subject?" Wally answers, "I don't know." Frustrated with Wally's response, the Boss throws both arms in the air and yells, "How could you not know?" Wally answers, "What part of self-paced is confusing you?"

Mandatory Training

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Mandatory Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #avoidance, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #training

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You haven't finished the mandatory compliance training modules. Alice: I'm waiting for a strategic time to do them. Boss: Oh, okay. Want to go to lunch? Alice: I would love to, but I have training modules to do.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #beef eating, #just stress, #mandatory cpr, #middle aged men, #training for emplyees, #pear shaped

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert says to Dilbert and Asok the Intern, "The company will be holding mandatory CPR training for all employees." Asok says, "GAA!!" The Boss looks on as Asok says to Catbert, "I am surrounded by pear-shaped, beef-eating, middle-aged men who I prefer not to touch." Catbert and The Boss look on as Asok rubs his chest and says, "Uh-oh... I hope that's just stress."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mouse training, #mandatory, #western grip, #carpal tunnel, #weak muscles, #two handed mouse, #massage, #back

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is sitting at his computer. Tina approaches and says, "I'm signing up people for the mandatory mouse training club." Tina continues, "I see you're using a Western grip. That's just begging for carpal tunnel." Tina grabs Dilbert's wrist and says, "Weak muscles... I'll put you in the two- handed mouse class." Dilbert responds, "Ouch."

Mandatory Safety Meeting

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Mandatory Safety Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #safety, #catch-22, #choosing, #unsafe

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You have to go to a mandatory safety training class right now. Dilbert: Is it safe for me to miss the deadline you gave me for this assignment? Boss: No, you lose either way. Dilbert: Hmm. Maybe I could work all night from home then drive to work exhausted.

Stapler Training

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Stapler Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #training, #planning, #meeting, #stapler, #safety, #mandatory, #fight

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: dilbert, what have you accomplished since our planning meeting? dilbert: the planning meeting was this morning. all i've done since then is take a mandatory training class on stapler safety. boss: but now you're fresh and ready for the fight? dilbert: only if it's a stapler fight.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mandatory training, #business ethics, #save money, #training, #decorate offcie, #taken training, #common sense

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss asks Dilbert, "Have you taken the mandatory training for business ethics?" Dilbert answers, "No. But if you SAY I did then you'll save some money on training which you can spend to decorate your office." The Boss says, "Luckily, I haven't taken the training myself." Dilbert says, "I hear it's mostly common sense anyway."