Mars Comic Strips
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7 Results for Mars
View 1 - 7 results for mars comic strips. Discover the best "Mars" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday June 03,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #noriko, #generation, #Kids, #power, #names, #ship, #oxygen, #mars, #plan
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit on the grass. Noriko stands between them saying, "You adults are ruining the planet for my generation." Noriko continues, "We kids have no power now, but I'm taking names. When we take power we'll ship you all to a penal colony on Mars." Dilbert replies, "There's no oxygen on Mars." Noriko says, "Oh, NOW you learn to plan ahead."
Saturday August 21,
2004
Tags #no annual raises, #ouift, #cafeteria napkins, #colonize mars, #distractions, #guide conversation away
Transcript
Catbert: Evil director of human resources The Boss: How do I tell people that there won't be any annual raises?" CAtbert: If someone tries to raise the topic, guide the conversation away." "...And thats why my outfit is made of cafeteria napkins." "Do you think we'll ever colonize Mars?"
Monday December 26,
2016
Volunteers For Mars Trip
Tags #space, #astronaut, #engineering, #karma, #death, #design, #medical
Transcript
Boss: I need volunteers to go to Mars in the spaceship we're building. Dilbert: Ask Ted. He's dispensable because he's a terrible engineer. Boss: Ted designed the spaceship. Dilbert: Karma will sort that all out.
Thursday October 22,
2020
First Astronaut
Tags #astronaut, #business, #coffee, #division, #face mask, #honor, #question, #safety, #space, #technology, #test, #mars
Transcript
carol: our space division asked if you would accept the honor of being their first astronaut to mars. boss: i didn't know they had even tested it for safety yet. carol: he asked too many questions.
Sunday June 08,
2008
Tags #really show, #camera, #capture failures, #humiliations, #dull act of insignificance, #fill void, #fathering children, #being famous
Transcript
Dogbert says, "I decided to produce a reality show about your life." Dilbert says, "What?" Dogbert says, "The cameras will follow you around and capture all of your failures and humiliations." Dilbert says, "Why would I agree to that?" Dogbert says, "Because you suffer from the dull ache of insignificance." Dogbert says, "You can only fill the horrible void in your soul by fathering children or being famous." Dilbert says, "Maybe I prefer to have children." Dogbert says, "And maybe you prefer to flap your ears and fly to Mars." Dogbert says, "Do you see where I'm going with this?" BOP A cameraman says, "Sorry."
Wednesday December 28,
2016
Picking The Spaceship Staff
Tags #space, #space flight, #rocket, #death, #sacrifice, #astronaut, #medical
Transcript
CEO: How's the Mars spaceship project going? Boss: Good. I picked our worst employees to be on the first test flight, just in case it explodes. CEO: Good thinking. Boss: We have two ways to win and no way to lose.
Thursday December 29,
2016
Oxygen Not In The Budget
Tags #space flight, #astronaut, #oxygen, #breathing, #leadership, #obliviousness
Transcript
Boss: I'm happy to announce that we launched our company's spaceship to Mars. We only had enough in the budget to give them oxygen for three-quarters of the trip. So I told them to breathe smarter, not harder. It's called leadership.