Mechanical Pencil Comic Strips
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36 Results for Mechanical Pencil
View 1 - 10 results for mechanical pencil comic strips. Discover the best "Mechanical Pencil" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday September 01,
1994
Tags #macro economics, #diagram, #flood victim, #mechanical pencil, #erase
Transcript
Professor: Lets start with a brief refresher in macro economics. This diagram explains why Im and expert in money yet I dress like a flood victim. You'll have no trouble with the rest of the course unless your mechanical pencil jammed...lets erase....
Saturday September 02,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #pencil, #downward
Transcript
Dilbert holds up a chart and says to Dogbert, "On this graph, I have plotted the frequency of snide comments that you have made about me. I'm happy to report that the recent trend is downward." Dilbert asks, "See the big dip?" Dogbert says, "Get out your pencil . . ."
Friday June 07,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #palm, #reading, #psychic, #short, #pencil, #grease, #intelligence, #Dogbert
Transcript
Dilbert sits at a table with a woman who looks at his hand and says, "Your life line is very short." The sign behind them says, "Palm Reading $20." The woman writes on Dilbert's hand and says, "I can get you a few more years by extending the line with this grease pencil." Back at home, Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Someday I should go back and have her lengthen my intelligence line too." Dogbert replies, "I'd hurry."
Monday November 04,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #pencil, #electric, #sharpener, #excalibert, #whoever, #remove, #ceo, #co-worker
Transcript
Dilbert says to a man, "Somebody left a pencil in the electric sharpener." The man replies, "That's 'Excalibert.'" The man continues, "Legend has it that whoever can remove Excalibert from the sharpener will become CEO." Dilbert removes the pencil and asks, "Like this?" A beam of light shines down on the pencil.
Tuesday November 05,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #pencil, #excalibert, #sharpener, #corporate, #legend, #ceo, #grovel
Transcript
A man says to Dilbert, "You did it! You removed the pencil 'Excalibert' from the sharpener." The caption says, "As corporate legend required, Dilbert became CEO." Dilbert holds Excalibert and three men bow to him. The caption says, "He immediately set about the task of making important decisions." A woman hands Dilbert a list and says, "Here's the list of people who didn't grovel sufficiently."
Wednesday May 20,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #approve, #buying, #lenin, #body, #desk, #listening, #nostrils, #pencil, #holder
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I didn't approve of you buying Lenin's body to begin with . . ." The body lies across milk crates. Dilbert continues, "And I certainly don't approve of you making a desk out of it." Dilbert asks, "Are you listening to me?" Dogbert says, "Hey, if I flip him over I can use his nostrils as a pencil holder!"
Friday July 22,
1994
Tags #market research, #market segment, #wild fungi, #pencil erasers, #head rubbed, #piece of paper
Transcript
"I'd like your opinion for my market research, Ratbert." "Me?!!" "I've lumped you in the market sgetment that includes wild fungi and pencil erasers." "Question one: would you enjoy having your head rubbed vigorously on a piece of paper?" "Who wouldn't?"
Wednesday September 11,
1996
Tags #team building, #exercise, #solve problems, #working sundial, #pencil, #donut, #make any differnce, #health
Transcript
Dogbert says to Alice, Dilbert, the Boss and Wally, "This next exercise will challenge your ability to solve problems as a team." Dogbert says, "Build a working sundial using only a pencil and a donut." Four hours later, the Boss says with his mouth full, "One more bite isn't going to make any difference." The pencil lies next to a pile of crumbs on the table. Dilbert covers his eyes and sobs.
Thursday September 12,
1996
Tags #hopeless, #losers, #pencil, #team building exercise, #union rlules
Transcript
Alice, Dilbert, Wally and the Boss sit around a table. The Boss is sleeping. Alice yells, "It's hopeless! You're losers! We'll never make a sundial out of a pencil and an eaten donut!" The janitor enters the room and says, "Hee hee! All you had to do was stick the pencil in the donut." The janitor lies over the table with the pencil sticking out of his back. Dilbert says, "We just broke all kinds of union rules." Wally says, "But hey! Look at the shadow from the pencil!"
Thursday March 26,
1998
Tags #rag man, #project luser, #budget cuts, #beg for resources, #pencil shavings, #coffee
Transcript
Man comes up to Dilbert and introduces himself, "I'm the Rag Man from Project Luser." Rag Man says, "Budget cuts have hit our project hard. I'm forced to beg for resources." Dilbert holds out something and says, "I can spare some pencil shavings." Rag Man says, "Excellent! We make coffee out of that."