Men's Fashion Comic Strips
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Dilbert walks into "Bill's Big 'N' Egg-Shaped Men's Fashions." A sign in the window says, "Specializing in the ovoid man." Dilbert says to the salesclerk, "I want to some clothes that make a statement." The clerk responds, "All our clothes make a statement." The salesperson hands Dilbert a sweater and says, "This sweater says 'Help me, help me, I look like a big egg!'" Dilbert asks, "Does it come in brown?"
Boss: How was your meeting in Elbonia? Wally: Awesome! Did you know that the most sacred shrine in Elbonia looks exactly like a men's restroom? Boss: No. Wally: Right. So don't blame me for not knowing.
Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Notice anything different, Dogbert?" Dogbert replies, "Uh . . ." Dilbert says, "I'm wearing THREE pens, not just two." Dogbert says, "That's a pretty bold fashion statement." Dilbert replies, "I guess I was out of control."
Dilbert says to a salesclerk in a retail clothing store, "I'm looking for a fine wool suit, in the $700 range. Something fashionable yet timeless." The clerk hands him a suit and says, "Try this $35 nylon beauty, suitable for swimming or dining out. The bell bottoms are no extra charge." Dilbert says, "Wow!" Dilbert walks away carrying the $35 suit. He says, "I guess I was just born to be a fashion pioneer."
The Boss: The new dress code allows casual clothing on fridays. Wally and Dilbert: Gulp The Boss: You'll have to make actual fashion decisions that will be scrutinized by hundreds of your coworkers! wally: Im thinking "garanimals" form 'sears"
Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk. Reading a report, the Boss says, "Change these dates . . . and add six more meetings and use the phrase 'customer focus.'" Dilbert looks down at the desk where a tiny figure has appeared. Dilbert says, "Uh-Oh . . . your micro-management has caused my ego to manifest itself and beg for survival." The tiny figure says, "I'm shrinking!" The Boss splats the tiny figure with a fly swatter and says to Dilbert, "Run and get me some paper towels . . . five of them . . . from the men's room."
Alice walks past Wally's cubicle. Wally says, "Well, it wouldn't be Friday if I didn't see Alice wearing her one pair of tan pants." Wally continues, "I love the 'business casual' look for the way it combines unattractive with unprofessional while diminishing neither." Alice responds, "Do you think the fashion opinion of a male engineer matters to me??" Dilbert enters wearing the same print shirt and pants as Alice. Dilbert yells, "Twins!"
Dilbert stands in front of his open closet and says, "I hate my shirts. Each one has either a stain or a missing button." Dilbert examines a shirt on a hanger and says, "They say engineers are not concerned with fashion, but that's not fair." Dilbert holds up two shirts and asks Dogbert who is sitting on the bed, "Which stain goes with this tie?" Dogbert replies, "Definitely the marinara."
Dilbert is sitting in a chair and Dogbert says, 'Do you have any 'silly putty' I can use as a fake beauty mark?" Dilbert and Dogbert ist on Dilbert's bed. Dogbert has a huge lump of silly putty on his head. Dilbert holds upa mirror and says, "Maybe you should use less." Dogbert says, "There's no such thing as too much beauty." Meanwhile, at fashion headquaters... One guy looks a photograph and says, "We got away with 'heroin chic.' What's next?" The other guy says, "How about dogs with tumors?" A big pile of photos lies onthe table.
At Fashion Headquarters, an ugly looking woman with short hair and fashionably outdated glasses says, "You could be our next supermodel. I love the tumor." Dogbert wags his tail and says, "It's a beauty mark." The woman says, "We prefer our supermodels to look unhealthy in a sexy way." Dogbert says, "Okay, it's a tumor." Dogbert wags his tail some more and says, "I can add a few more. It's just Silly Putty." The woman puts out her arms to stop him and says, "No, it would be easy to overdo that sort of thing."