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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 14, 1991's comic on:


Tags #coffee, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #drinking, #dependent, #chemicals, #slow, #work, #monday, #thursday

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I quit drinking coffee. I don't like to be dependent on chemicals." Dogbert asks, "How's it feel?" Dilbert replies, "I felt a little slow getting ready for work, but you have to expect that on a Monday." Dogbert says, "It's Thursday."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 13, 2001's comic on:


Tags #calling in sick, #honesty, #monday, #puked, #puked up organs, #questioned, #suspicious, #vomit, #glah!, #optional guts

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An under-the-weather Alice sits angrily as The Boss says, "I'm a bit suspicious about you calling in sick yesterday on a Monday, Alice." The Boss looks startled as Alice exclaims, "Glah!" and her internal organs fly out of her mouth. Alice says to Dilbert, "Luckily I had lots of optional guts."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 2001's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #monday morning, #travel all day, #stealing life, #reschedule, #social plans, #business

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The Boss sits behind his desk and says, "I told them you would be at the meeting Monday morning." Dilbert says, "What?? That means I have to travel all day Sunday. You're stealing my life!" Dilbert sits on the couch in his robe eating. He turns to Dogbert and says, "Then he said if I had social plans he'd reschedule." Dogbert replies, "Ouch."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 03, 2001's comic on:


Tags #start on monday, #service industry, #space -time, #contiuum, #calendar, #no mondays

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Dilbert stands at a table reviewing a sheet of paper with a contractor. The contractor says, "Here's my estimate. I'll start the job on Monday." The contractor continues, "When I say 'Monday,' I'm referring to the service industry's space-time continuum." The contractor holds out a calendar and says, "I'm not supposed to show you this, but check out the calendar." Dilbert looks and says, "No Mondays."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 13, 2001's comic on:


Tags #rumor of layoffs, #nope, #friday, #monday, #day off, #boss

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Ted approaches the Boss' desk and asks, "I heard a rumor that there might be layoffs on Friday. Is it true?" The Boss shakes his head and signals with his arms. He says, "Absolutely not. No way. Nope. Negatory. No, no, no, no, no." Ted says, "Great. Can I take off Friday?" The Boss looks away guiltily and says, "Monday would be better."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 13, 2001's comic on:


Tags #psychological profile, #start monday, #employee handbook, #weekend, #gentle biker, #psycho hillbilly

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Catbert is sitting on his desk. He says, "Your psychological profile test results are excellent. Can you start Monday?" A hairy, half dressed man carrying a knife replies, "Monday is fine. I'll read the employee handbook over the weekend." The hairy man says to Dilbert and Alice, "The 'gentle biker' look is overdone. I'm going for 'psycho hillbilly.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 18, 2007's comic on:


Tags #hiring coordinator, #projects, #starts monday, #input

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The Boss: I'd like your input on the idea of hiring a coordinator for our projects. "Terrible idea." "Waste of money." "Wouldn't help." "He starts Monday."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 2010's comic on:


Tags #load calcs, #remind, #monday, #determined, #forget, #remember, #fist, #hiding day, #good luck, #hallway, #standing

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Coworker says, "Wally, I need your load calcs by Tuesday." Wally says, "Remind me on Monday." Coworker says, "You're hoping I won't remember to remind you. Then you'll say it's my fault." Coworker says, "But I will remember, and I will remind you." Wally says, "Good luck. Monday is my hiding day."

Dogbert Will Start Monday Or Tuesday

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Dogbert Will Start Monday Or Tuesday - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 2018's comic on:


Tags #negotiation, #irony, #appointment, #deadline, #consultant, #training, #business

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Narrator: Dogbert The Negotiation Trainer. Boss: We'll see you on Monday for our first lesson. Dogbert: Sure. I'll see you on Monday or Tuesday. Possibly Wednesday. Boss: We paid you to start on Monday. Dogbert: Think how much you'll learn when I don't show up.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 02, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #elbonia, #east, #european country, #abandoned, #comunism, #capitalism

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Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Did you hear that the tiny east European country of Elbonia has abandoned communism?" Dogbert replies, "Whoa! Big changes ahead." The caption says, "Elbonia: Monday." A pig and a man sit in the mud on a mud farm. The caption says, "Elbonia: Tuesday." The pig wears a sign that says, "My pig," the man wears a sign that says, "My feet."