Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs sit on the floor playing cards. Dogbert says to Ratbert, "Let me introduce you to our dinosaurs, Bob and Dawn." Dawn screams, "Eeeek!! A mouse!" and jumps into the air. Ratbert says, "Not a mouse, a rat!!" Dawn says, "Oops. Sorry. You kinda look like a mouse." Ratbert replies, "No offense taken."
Dilbert watches as a woman says to the janitor, "Willy, there's a mouse in my office. Please get rid of it." Willy replies, "Haw haw! Twenty-five years of the so-called Women's Movement and nothing is different!" The woman says, "Do it now, or I'll fire your butt." Willy says, "This part is a little different."
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert enters holding a camera and asks, "Would you like to pose for my new calendar, 'The Men of Engineering?'" Dogbert explains, "I hope to dispel the myth that engineers are out of shape and unaware of what others are thinking." Dilbert feels his bicep muscle and says, "I'm still kind of 'pumped' from using the mouse." Dogbert says, "Take off your shirt."
Dilbert: Zimbu, you're not supposed to use your tail to operate the mouse.
If tails were a natural advantage for engineers then evolution would provide usual with tails!
The Boss: Dilbert, I don't believe you've met Rocky, out new C programmer.
Ratbert: "Why is that thing called a mouse and not a rat?"
Ratbert: "At the risk of being labelled, quote, politically correct, unquote, I must object."
"I demand to have something named in my honor!
Dilbert: "What about the 'scuzzy' interface? Hee hee."
"As my dogumentary begins, we see the engineer hard at work."
"Suddenly, he leaps into action! Years of training and experience come into focus!"
"The screen saver has been deactivated. But doubt sets in...was there a better way?"
"I should have moved the mouse."
The Boss peers into Dilbert's cubicle and asks, "Are you working twice as fast since I doubled your staff?" Dilbert sits at his desk with Barry. He answers, "I've coded twelve modules . . . Barry is on a journey of discovery where he will find out my mouse is not a microphone." Speaking into the mouse, Barry says, "Hello! Anybody!" Back in his office, the Boss sits in front of the computer contemplating his mouse. He says, "That would explain why nobody ever comments on my announcements over the P.A. system."
Dilbert sits at his computer. The Boss enters and says, "I've decided to be more of a hands-on manager." The Boss stands behind Dilbert and yells, "Move the mouse . . . Up . . . Up . . . Over . . . More . . . Now click it!! Click it!!" The Boss raises his arms over his head and screams, "No!!! You fool!!!" Dilbert says, "This has 'long day' written all over it."
Mouse: You're making a big mistake. Im no ordinary mouse, If you kissy me I'll turn into a prince!!!
DiD I say "Prince"? I meant Id become the symbol for the performer formerly known as Prince. Ha ha ha!! Get it?
Mouse: You're immune to both romance and mirth, you must be a..a..
Dilbert: Thats right, I'm and engineer.
Dilbert says to Asok, "As an intern, your assignments won't be as glamorous as mine, but you'll gain experience." The Boss peers into Dilbert's cubicle and says, "Dilbert, I need a status report on the mouse pad inventory." Dilbert says to Asok, "See? My assignment has the word 'status' built right in." Asok looks worried and thinks, "Danger! Alert!"
