Mute Buttons Comic Strips

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14 Results for Mute Buttons

View 1 - 10 results for mute buttons comic strips. Discover the best "Mute Buttons" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 18, 2005's comic on:


Tags #conference call, #success, #set up, #15 people, #forgot to call in, #mute buttons, #spinning story

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Asok: The conference call was a huge sucess. "Three out of 15 people were available and only one of them forgot to call in." The boss: "So it was a phone call between two people?" Asok: "It would have been if they hadn't used the mute buttons."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 10, 1995's comic on:


Tags #more involved, #project, #roll up sleeves, #work buttons

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Dilbert and Wally sit at a desk. The Boss enters and says, "I've decided to get more involved with your project." Wally and Dilbert think, "Uh-oh." The Boss continues, "I'm just going to roll up my sleeves and pitch in." Trying to unbutton his sleeve cuffs, the Boss says, "Does anybody know how to work these buttons?" Wally covers his eyes with his hands and Dilbert leans back in disgust.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 05, 2013's comic on:


Tags #designers, #ignorance (knowledge), #black buttons, #black case, #hardware, #user interface, #normal light, #nerdy, #art, #package design

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Dilbert: You designed our hardware with black buttons on a black case. The user interface will be invisible in normal light. Designer: But more important, it looks great! Dilbert: You don't know what "important" means, do you? Designer: It sounds nerdy. I majored in art.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2013's comic on:


Tags #meetings, #telephones, #work ethic, #teleconference, #phone on mute, #nap, #weaselable

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Coworker: Can you attend our Tuesday meeting? Wally: I'll teleconference. Coworker: That will make me wonder if you called in, put your phone on mute, and took a nap. Wally: We useless people call that weaselable doubt.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 08, 2014's comic on:


Tags #choosing, #thinking, #tests, #orange buttons, #more clicks, #than green, #lost faith, #human intelligence, #green looks better, #liberated, #tyranny of thinking

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Dilbert: Our A-B tests show that orange buttons get 13% more clicks than green. I have now officially lost all faith in human intelligence. Boss: Stick with the green. It looks better. Dilbert: Sure. I feel liberated from the tyranny of thinking.

Dogbert The Product Designer

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Dogbert The Product Designer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 28, 2015's comic on:


Tags #design, #evil, #frustration, #product designer, #torture, #hate people, #styrofoam debris, #invisible buttons

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Dogbert: I decided to become a product designer because I hate people. I will fill every package with styrofoam debris and affix hard-to-remove stickers all over the cases. I'll make the buttons invisible by making them black on a black surface. Ha ha ha! Dilbert: I've always wondered how this stuff happens.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 1995's comic on:


Tags #create illusion, #work long hours, #voice mails, #Dilbert, #in underwear, #obscene message, #group code

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Dogbert hands Dilbert the phone and says, "You can create the illusion that you work long hours by leaving voice mails for your boss at 4 a.m." Dilbert says into the phone, "Hi, this is Dilbert. It's 4 a.m. and I'm in my underwear and I thought of you . . .Oops . . . Erase . . . Oops . . ." As he presses the buttons on the phone it makes beeping noises. Dogbert's ears stand up in astonishment. Dogbert asks, "Did you just send an obscene message to your boss?" Dilbert looks at the phone and says, "No . . . I think I hit the group code."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 01, 1996's comic on:


Tags #leadership, #air traffic control system, #on time, #under budget, #feature creep, #dangerous, #wall clock

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Dogbert stands on an air traffic control panel. He says to the Boss, "Thanks to my leadership, the new air traffic control system is designed on time and under budget." Dogbert continues, "I had to cut a few corners. This big radar-looking thing is a wall clock. And most of the buttons are glued on." The Boss says, "It looks like it might be um . . . dangerous." Dogbert says angrily, "Great . . . I finish early and what do I get: 'feature creep.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 1996's comic on:


Tags #pointy haired boss, #speakerphone, #important engineer training, #talks back to speakerphone, #boss heard insults

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Dilbert, Alice, Wally and Asok sit at a conference table. Dilbert says, "Our pointy-haired boss will be joining us by speakerphone." Alice tells Asok, "This is an important part of your engineering trainig, Asok." Asok asks, "What do I do?" Wally explains, "When Alice presses the mute button, you make witty and sarcastic remarks." The phone rings. The Boss says, "Hello, everyone. I'd like to talk about the new compensation plan." Alice presses a button and points to Asok. Asok says, "Tell us some lies, you ugly, two-faced, hypocritical troll!" Asok continues, "I am Asok the Intern and I spit on your feeble compensation plan!" Asok continues, "I've found stuff on the bottom of my shoe that was smarter than you!!" He laughs. Dilbert and Asok walk out of the conference room. Dilbert says, "Next time, a bit wittier . . . And make sure Alice really presses the mute button."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 20, 2001's comic on:


Tags #phone call, #outgoing message, #paris, #press one, #movie, #press two, #bad feeling

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Dilbert, pressing buttons on his portable telephone to the sound of, "beep boop beep," thinks to himself, "I hope she's home." Listening to his phone, Dilbert hears, "If you'd like to take me to Paris, press one. If you are inviting me to a lousy movie, press two." Dilbert presses a button on his phone to the sound of, "beep," and thinks to himself, "I've got a bad feeling about this."