Network Design Meeting Comic Strips
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1000 Results for Network Design Meeting
View 1 - 10 results for network design meeting comic strips. Discover the best "Network Design Meeting" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday December 25,
2011
Tags #christmas presents, #embarrassment, #merry christmas, #network design meeting, #brand of makeup, #hid, #loobby, #elevator, #closet for months, #creepiness
Transcript
Dilbert: Merry Christmas, Sarah. This is for you. Woman: Have you met? Dilbert: We attended the same network design meeting last April. I overheard you telling someone in the hallway that you like a specific brand of makeup. So I bought a box of it and kept it in the closet for months. I came to work early today and hid behind the sculpture in the lobby until I saw you heading to the elevator. Alice: I didn't know you could gift wrap creepiness. Sorry. Just act like I'm not here.
Wednesday November 14,
2001
Tags #pulls knife, #pleasure to meet, #psycho hillbilly, #crazy old coot, #network design engineers
Transcript
The psycho hillbilly raises his knife at Asok and says, "Hi. It's a pleasure to meet you." Asok jumps back and exclaims, "Gaaa!!" Asok says, "You look like a psycho hillbilly" The hillbilly replies, "Thank you very much." The hillbilly continues, "We network design engineers like to dress with a theme." Asok asks, "May I call you crazy old coot?"
Saturday September 27,
2003
Tags #network design, #local trees, #social skills
Transcript
Man; "I was an engineer before I got into marketing, so I have a few suggestions for your network design." man: "Get rid of this 'Cisco' doohickey, whatever it is, and put it in a catapult made from local trees." Dilbert: "Has it been awhile?" Man: "At least I have good social skills now, you dipweed.
Saturday July 21,
2012
Tags #computer software, #inventions, #3d network, #motion sensors, #sneezed, #merged network, #15th of cisco
Transcript
In the near future Wally: I was manipulating a 3-D network model using my hand motion sensors. It was all good until I sneezed and accidentally merged my network design with my outlook calendar. Boss: When will you have that fixed? Wally: I should be done by... the 15th of Cisco.
Wednesday January 18,
2017
The Illusion Of Work
Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #deception
Transcript
Wally: It's easier to create the illusion of work than it is to do actual work. That's why I carry this red folder with me wherever I go. Man: Can you attend a design meeting at two? Wally: Ooh... I wish I could, but I'm behind on the red file.
Sunday May 01,
1994
Tags #all day meetings, #cutting staff, #giving stats reports, #layers, #quality team meeting, #root cause, #slow computers, #slow design, #wild guesses
Transcript
Dilbert: Thank you all for coming to our engineering quality team meeting. Dilbert: Today we'll try to identify the root cause of our slow design process. Wally: Let me take some wild guesses here. Management keeps increasing our work and cutting our staff. Wally: we spend all out time giving status reports to unnecessary layers of management!! Wally: ow we're having all -day meetings to talk about our efficiency!! Dilbert: I was kinda hoping for some thing that inst anybody fault. Our computers are too slow. we need new ones, Dilbert: now we're getting someplace.
Wednesday July 26,
1995
Tags #proposed work, #plan, #stress test, #product, #network conditions, #accomplish, #downloading, #large image files, #servers, #on net, #naughty pictures
Transcript
The Boss, Wally and Dilbert sit around a conference table. Wally hands the Boss a piece of paper and says, "My proposed work plan for the year is to stress-test our product under severe network conditions." Wally continues, "I will accomplish this by downloading large image files from the busiest servers on the net." As Wally and Dilbert walk away from the meeting, Wally comments, "I was THIS close to making it my job to download naughty pictures." Dilbert says, "It's just as well; I would have had to kill you."
Sunday October 26,
1997
Tags #editable wax fruit, #live at desk, #no social life, #social activity, #vending machine food, #marketing network
Transcript
During a staff meeting, The Boss says, "It has come to my attention that one of you has a social life." Wally says, "There must be some mistake." The Boss says, "We can't be successful until our social lives are worse than the industry average." He stands up and says, "Our competitors spend the nights in their cubicles. They eat from vending machines." The Boss walks behind Wally, Dilbert and Alice. He says, "Someone here has not shown the same level of competetive spirit." The Boss grabs Asok by the collar and says, "Someone had a social activity last night!" Asok cries, "I'm sorry! I thought they were friends... but they were only recruiting for a multi-level marketing network!!!" Dilbert says, "What were they selling?" Asok says, "Edible wax fruit. Brochure?"
Monday December 10,
2001
Tags #innovative design firm, #observe methods, #steal from them, #secret, #hiring smart people, #involves easles
Transcript
The Boss addresses a meeting, "We've hired the world's most innovative design firm." The Boss continues, "We'll observe their successful methods and steal them for our own. Heh Heh Heh." Dilbert turns to The Boss and says, "Maybe their secret is hiring smart people." The Boss responds, "I'm hoping it involves easels."
Friday May 30,
2003
Tags #new product brochures, #design awards, #great, #award winning designer, #can't stop complaining
Transcript
In a meeting, a co-worker hands Dilbert a brochure and exclaims, "The new product brochures have already won design awards!" Dilbert responds, "That's great, but our product won't do any of the things you claim here." The co-worker crosses his arm and says, "Well, who should we believe - the award-winning designer or the guy who can't stop complaining?"