No Cursing Comic Strips
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7 Results for No Cursing
View 1 - 7 results for no cursing comic strips. Discover the best "No Cursing" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday June 25,
1999
Tags #quality assurance, #secretary assistant, #intern, #yell at kids, #curising, #no cursing
Transcript
Asok sits next to Carol at her desk. Dilbert says, "Asok! Did you escape your job in quality assurance?" Asok says, "Yes, I had to take a job as a secretary's assistant. I'll work my way back up to intern." Carol hands Asok the phone and says, "It's four o'clock. Call my kids and yell at them." ASok says, "Cursing or no cursing?"
Sunday April 20,
1997
Tags #tips from headquarters, #long distance, #short words, #cheap boss, #save money, #dumb ideas, #swiss trip, #curse words
Transcript
The Boss, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Here are some money-saving tips from headquarters." The Boss reads from a list, "'When calling long distance, use short words." The Boss continues to read, "'If everyone did this, our fifty-billion dollar company could save nine hundred dollars per year.'" The Boss reads, "'Tip two: For faxes, use Sans Serif fonts. They transmit faster. Annual saving could exceed three hundred dollars." The Boss says, "Next item on the agenda, remember I'll be in Switzerland next week on a fact-finding trip." The Boss continues, "If you need to call me at my four star hotel, be sure to use short words." Dilbert whispers to Alice, "You might want to save those short words until he's on his clue-finding trip." The Boss stands in his hotel room in Switzerland. He holds the phone and listens to someone cursing on the other end. He says, "Those are NOT all short words."
Tuesday February 09,
1999
Tags #meeting moth, #wool clothes, #participants, #moth eaten clothes, #empty stomach
Transcript
Dilbert walks cursing. His clothing is chewed to bits. Alice also curses. her clothing also has large bites taken out of it. The meeting moth walks with his mouth full and his hands full of cloth. The moth thinks, "A "meeting moth" should never go to a meeting on an empty stomach."
Thursday July 07,
2005
Tags #do something, #let you know, #spitting on forehead, #whats worng
Transcript
"When you do something that I don't like, I'll let you know by cursing and then spitting on your forehead." "Maybe you could just tell me what I did wrong." "#*$@!"
Friday July 17,
2015
Double Standard
Tags #language, #Women, #Men, #curse, #cursing, #swearing, #swear, #yelling, #fair, #fairness, #equality, #double-standard
Transcript
Alice: There's a double-standard. Men can shout and curse and no one blinks. But if I say one stern word to someone, they call me "emotional." Dilbert: I've seen you make men cry during meetings. Alice: Only the wusses.
Monday February 03,
2020
Dilbert Organizes The Lab
Tags #sarcasm, #business, #tech, #lab, #reorganize, #co-workers, #grateful
Transcript
dilbert: this week i reorganized the tech lab from top to bottom. dogbert: were your co-workers grateful? dilbert: yes, assuming they show it by rummaging through the wrong drawers and cursing.
Sunday April 26,
2020
Dogbert Designs Headphones
Tags #design, #business, #headphones, #maximum, #customer, #annoyance, #charging, #port, #guess, #incorrect, #frustration, #fit, #customers, #ship, #user
Transcript
dogbert: i've designed these over-ear headphones for maximum customer annoyance. the charging port is only on one side, so the user has a fifty percent chance of guessing wrong. and the charger only fits if you put it right-side up. to increase the frustration, i made the plug look the same on both sides. best of all, the plug is so poorly designed that half the time it doesn't seem to fit, even when you put it in correctly. i made the headphones black, so you can't easily find the charger hole in low light. ninety percent of users will be cursing us every time they try to recharge. customers won't know any of this until after they purchase. boss: ship it.