North Elbonian Contractor Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

238 Results for North Elbonian Contractor

View 1 - 10 results for north elbonian contractor comic strips. Discover the best "North Elbonian Contractor" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags project, little snag, north elbonian contractor, military technology, belligerent homelenad, huge laser, vaporize, contract employees, building workshop

View Transcript

Transcript

In a meetin, Dilbert says, "My project has hit a little snag." Dilbert says, "Our North Elbonian contracts stole our military technology for their belligerent homeland. They're building a huge laser to vaporize us." Alice's eyes bulge out. The Boss says, "Next year, remind me to include contract employees in the team-building workshop." Alice says, "The floor is warm!"

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags communist north elbonian contractors, top secret military project, executed for treason, legal department, execution instead

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert waves his arms in the air and says, "I'm a little concerned about your hiring communist North Elbonian contractors to help on my top secret military project." The Boss reads a newspaper and says, "Don't worry. What's the worst thing that could happen?" Dilbert says, "I could be executed for treason." The Boss says, "Talk to our legal department." Dilbert says, Could I opt for the execution instead?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags frustration, office workers, meaningful work, gone for a week, labor camp

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I got kicked out of a North Elbonian labor camp for working too hard. It was the first time I had ever experienced meaningful work and I got carried away. Boss: And your name is...? Dilbert: Seriously? I was gone for one week!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fear, violence, inspection, elbonian facility, disputed territory, totalitarian state, north elbonia, forshadowing

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need you to do a site inspection at our Elbonian facility. It's located in a disputed territory on the border of the totalitarian state of North Elbonia. Was that enough foreshadowing or should I say something about how they treat spies? Dilbert: No, you nailed it.

Contractor Wants To Be Employee

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Contractor Wants To Be Employee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags negotiation, contract work, contractor, pay.wages

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I've been a contractor here for over a year. Maybe you should just hire me. Boss: Who are you? I didn't even know I was paying you. Man: Perhaps we can pretend this conversation never happened. Boss: That feels like the best option.

Elbonian Cyber Threat Meeting

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonian Cyber Threat Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, meeting, office, office workers, elbonian, cyber threat

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: what are we doing about the elbonian cyber threat? dilbert: i called a meeting for tomorrow to come up with a plan for dealing with it. the boss: your weak response proves you are an elbonian spy. dilbert: what? to be continued...

Elbonian Spy

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonian Spy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, elbonian, spy, engineers, economy, intellectual, property, collaborate

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i hired an elbonian spy who, i assume, will try to steal our intellectual property. it's hard to find good engineers in this economy, so that is a risk i am willing to take. dilbert, i'd like you to collaborate with him. dilbert: can we call it something else?

Elbonian Words

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonian Words - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, elbonian, headquarters, language, factory, Word

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: headquarters has released a new list of things you are not supposed to say when visiting our elbonian factory. at the top of the list, never say "glfalawah" to an elbonian. alice: because it means something naughty? boss: because it isn't a word.

Elbonian Virus

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonian Virus - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, health & safety, office workers, pandemic, elbonian, virus, kill, beards, fuzzy, hat, made

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: the elbonian virus has reached pandemic proportions. elbonian: just because a virus doesn't kill people with beards and tall, fuzzy hats, that doesn't mean it was made in elbonia. dilbert: was it made in elbonia? elbonian: yes, but i think my point still stands.

Elbonian Literature Degree

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonian Literature Degree - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags applicant, books, college, degree, education, elbonian, interview, language, major, test taker, translation

View Transcript

Transcript

applicant: i majored in elbonian literature in college. which is extra challenging because i don't speak elbonian and none of the books are translated. dilbert: how did you get a degree in elbonian literature without reading any? applicant: i'm a great test-taker.