Obver Shoulder Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

50 Results for Obver Shoulder

View 1 - 10 results for obver shoulder comic strips. Discover the best "Obver Shoulder" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #spelled wrong, #technical recommendation, #boss doubts dilbert, #obver shoulder, #computer, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss stands behind Dilbert's desk and says, "I studied your technical recommendation and decided it's impossible." Dilbert replies, "I already did it." The Boss says, "It will never work." Dilbert replies, "It's working perfectly." The Boss points to the document and says, "You spelled this word wrong." Dilbert says, "That's a number."

View more books now

Ceo Gives Shoulder Rubs

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ceo Gives Shoulder Rubs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #flirting, #implementation, #new rules, #shoulder rub, #sock collar, #team spirit

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Hey, Alice. Let me give you a shoulder rub in the name of team spirit. CEO: AAAAGH!!! Alice: click CEO: I hate having a court - ordered shock collar. The boss: I don't see a...oh.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #friendship, #gadgets, #mobile (cell) phones, #shoulder holder, #jealousy is attractive, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I invented a shoulder holder for my phone. I felt bad keeping my best friend in my pocket. Jealousy in not attractive.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #tattoo, #shoulder, #tasteful, #timeless, #kick me

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I'm thinking of getting a tattoo." Dilbert continues, "On my shoulder . . . Something tasteful yet timeless. I don't want to regret it later." Dilbert asks, "Any suggestions?" Dogbert replies, "How about 'Kick me?'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #tabloid, #devoted, #lies, #impatience, #fools, #legendary, #choked, #man, #necktie, #stupid, #questions, #shoulder

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Dogbert starts a tabloid newspaper devoted to lies about himself." Dogbert stands on a desk chair and types. Dilbert asks, "Where do you get your ideas?" Dogbert types, "Dogbert's impatience with fools was legendary. He once choked a man by his necktie for asking stupid questions." Dilbert looks over Dogbert's shoulder as Dogbert types, "It happened one day when the fool was reading over Dogbert's shoulder and got too close."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #albert, #bonding, #shoulder, #massage, #team, #player, #buddy, #vulcan, #death, #grip

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'll give you Albert a male bonding shoulder massage to show I'm a team player. Hey, Al! Keep up the work, Buddy! Oops... That might have been the Vulcan death grip.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #desired salary, #million dollars, #how much expected, #misleading, #salary, #fantasy layered, #little shoulder massge, #15 %, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert wears a suit and holds a briefcase. He says, "Wish me luck, Dogbert." Dogbert asks, "If you get more luck, wouldn't there be less luck available for me?" A woman at a desk looks at Dilbert's application and says, "For 'desired salary' you wrote 'one million dollars.'" Dilbert says, "Yes, thanks for asking." The woman says, "Perhaps the question is misleading. The application should have asked what salary you EXPECT." Dilbert replies, "Oh . . . Well, I expect you'll hire somebody more qualified and my salary will remain unchanged." The woman says, "No, too honest. I'm looking for something CLOSE to reality, with maybe twenty-percent fantasy layered on top." Dilbert replies, "Okay . . . I'd like a fifteen-percent raise and a little shoulder massage." Back at home, Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Why does it seem that I'm the only honest guy on earth?" Dogbert replies, "Your type tends not to reproduce."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cell phone, #invention, #old man's head, #face front, #shoulder, #talk, #creepy, #lightbulb, #edison, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "It's a cell phone shaped like an old man's head." Dilbert says, "It sits on your shoulder so you don't look as if you're talking to yourself." Dilbert says, "People probably told Edison that his lightbulb was creepy too."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #party, #woman, #date, #hold drink, #invent, #shoulder phone, #old man's head, #soup, #bones, #scary, #arm out, #surprised, #run away, #scared, #Dogbert, #trick, #auto-answer, #kiss

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "It's a shoulder phone shaped like an old man's head. I invented it myself." Phone says, "Let's make soup from her bones, just like the others!" Dilbert says, "I shouldn't have told Dogbert it has auto-answer." Phone says, "Kiss me! Now!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #behind the door, #busy aisel, #counsel, #counseling, #cubicle, #jittery, #jumpy, #looking over shoulder, #most instinct, #near doorway, #realx, #zombie

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss brings an employee into Catbert. The employee is bug-eyed and nervous looking. The Boss says, "This is Jittery Jeff. He needs counseling." The Boss continues as Jittery Jeff whips his head around, "I put him in a cubicle at the end of a busy aisle near a doorway." The Boss tells Catbert, "Now he's jittery because he thinks people are always looking over his shoulder." Catbert stands on the desk and says, "Leave him here. I'll counsel him up." Jittery Jeff sits down but continues to whip his head around. Catbert says, "Relax Jittery Jeff...It's okay now." Jeff begins to calm down as Catbert repeats, "Relax, relax, relax, relax." Suddenly, Catbert screams, "AAAGH!! Someone is behind the door!!" Jittery Jeff jumps up. Jittery Jeff lays slumped in his chair with his tongue hanging out of his mouth. Catbert tells the Boss, "Counseling is mostly instinct."