Once We Write Comic Strips
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342 Results for Once We Write
View 1 - 10 results for once we write comic strips. Discover the best "Once We Write" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 06,
1998
Tags #mordac, #preventer of information services, #guidlines for passwords, #six characters, #include numbers and letters, #upper and lower case, #change once a month, #touture employees, #write nothing down
Transcript
Man comes up to Dilbert and introduces himself, "I am Mordac, the preventer of information services. I bring new guidelines for passwords." Dilbert reads the guidelines, "'All passwords must be at least six characters long.. include numbers and letters.. include a mix of upper and lower case..'" Dilbert continues to read, "'Use different passwords for each system change once a month, do not write anything down.'" Mordac yells, "Squeal like a pig!!"
Tuesday February 25,
2003
Tags #blank cd, #demo, #empty case, #forgetting blank cd, #new product, #software, #travel, #travelled four hours, #unit, #once we write, #engineering
Transcript
Dilbert approaches a receptionist and says, "I have an appointment to see a demo of your new product." The salesman holds up a box and says to Dilbert, "And the unit will be in a case like this, but completely different, and it will have software, once we write it." Dilbert holds the box and says, "You let me travel four hours to see an empty case?" The salesman replies, "Are you forgetting the blank CD?"
Monday July 20,
2020
Dilbert Wants To Write Book
Tags #book, #boring, #colon, #elephant, #exercise, #interesting, #people, #sarcasm, #speaking, #technology, #write
Transcript
dilbert and dogbert wearing face masks on a walk. dilbert: i'm thinking about writing a book. dogbert: can boring people write interesting books? dilbert: maybe i write better than i speak. dogbert: sure, and maybe an elephant lives in my colon.
Tuesday February 01,
2011
Tags #honesty, #writing, #write, #birds walk keyboard, #Opinion, #technical part, #blabbing the ethernet
Transcript
Alice says, "Is this how you really write, or did birds walk on your keyboard?" Alice says, "I only need your opinion on the technical part of it." Alice says, "Okay, let's assume that your readers will know what you mean by 'blobbing on the ethernet.'"
Saturday June 04,
2011
Tags #writing, #writing systems, #press relese, #vp of engineering, #personal resons, #speculate, #bieber fever, #write fiction
Transcript
Boss: Tina, all I wanted you to say in the press release is that our VP of engineering is leaving for personal reasons. You didn't need to speculate on the reasons. Let's lost the part about "Bieber Fever." Tina: Everyone thinks it's easy to write fiction.
Monday May 15,
1989
Tags #poetry, #poem, #monkey, #animals
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert asks, "Well? What do you think of my new poem?" Dogbert replies, "I once read that given infinite time, a thousand monkeys with typewriters would eventually write the entire works of Shakespeare." Dilbert asks, "But what about MY poem?" Dogbert replies, "Three monkeys, ten minutes."
Thursday October 19,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #tombstone, #write, #cremated, #stuffed, #cheaper, #arm chair
Transcript
Dogbert sits in a chair and Dilbert stands in front of him. Dilbert asks, "If I died tomorrow, what would you write on my tombstone?" Dogbert replies, "I always assumed there would be no tombstone." Dilbert says, "Ah . . . You would have me cremated." Dogbert replies, "Or stuffed, whichever is cheaper."
Saturday February 01,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #singing, #square-dancing, #bluff, #slap, #checks, #write, #strangers, #spouse
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a stage holding a microphone and saying, "Swing your partner, dosey-do. Now clap your hands . . ." On the dance floor, people are square dancing. Dogbert thinks, "Uh-oh, that's all the square dance moves I know . . . I'll bluff the rest." Dogbert says, "Slap your partner in the face, / Write bad checks all over the place, / Flirt with strangers, annoy your spouse, / Get a divorce and lose your house . . . Uh . . . dosey-do."
Monday August 03,
1992
Tags #god, #language, #report, #Dilbert, #tim, #monkey, #incan, #awful, #write, #lucky, #translate
Transcript
Dilbert says to Tim, "Gee, Tim, you look awful." Tim replies, "I've been working for five days without any sleep to finish this report." Tim's clothes are disheveled and he has circles under his eyes. Tim continues, "At first I had a mental block. But on the fourth day I was visited by an Incan monkey god who told me what to write." Dilbert replies, "Wow, lucky break." Tim says, "Now I just have to find somebody who can translate his simple but beautiful language."
Monday August 24,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #good, #articles, #paper, #magnets, #sign, #language, #write, #white, #influence, #project, #working, #minutia
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss enters holding a newspaper and says, "There are two good articles in the paper today; one about magnets, and one on sign language." The Boss continues, "I'd like you to write a white paper on how these items could influence the project you're working on." Dilbert asks, "Do you even know what project I'm working on?" The Boss replies, "I don't have time to get into minutia."