One Degree Away Comic Strips
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1000 Results for One Degree Away
View 1 - 10 results for one degree away comic strips. Discover the best "One Degree Away" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday July 19,
1997
Tags #famous person, #sandra bullock, #kevin spacey, #eats bacon, #kevin who eats bacon, #one degree away, #close to fascinating
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his PC. Ratbert says, "Give me the name of any famous person." Dilbert says, "Sandra Bullock." Ratbert puts his hands to his temples, closes his eyes and thinks. He says, "Sandra Bullock was in a movie with Kevin Spacey... and Kevin Spacey eats bacon." Ratbert says, "See that? Everyone on Earth is only one degree from someone named Kevin who eats bacon!" Dilbert says, "That is SO close to being fascinating."
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Friday August 31,
1990
Tags #therapy, #unethical, #Dilbert, #biological clock, #ugly, #one, #ticking, #away
Transcript
Dilbert lies on a couch in a psychiatrist's office. The therapist says, "Frankly, I'm tired of hearing your little problems . . ." The psychologist says, "I hate my job . . . I haven't had a decent date in a year . . . My biological clock is ticking away . . ." Dilbert asks, "Would it be unethical to date one of your patients?" The doctor replies, "Yes, especially an ugly one."
Monday December 04,
2000
Tags #away from job, #blah blah, #cell phones, #jurors, #jury duty, #jury room, #read book, #talking
Transcript
Dilbert: AAHH, One week away from my job. Jury room Dilbert: I'll have hours of quiet time to read my new book, woman: There's a guy here with a book.
Saturday May 12,
1990
Tags #bad habits, #parallel, #universe, #sea bass, #section, #habit
Transcript
The panel says, "Dilbert presents: Bad Habits From a Parallel Universe!" A maitre d' says to Dilbert and Dogbert, "Table for Phleem?" Dilbert replies, "Yes. In the 'no slapping yourself with a sea bass' section." Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table listening to slapping noises. Dogbert says, "Great, one table away . . ." Dilbert says, "Do you ever wonder about the first person to try that habit?"
Wednesday October 15,
2003
Tags #used coffee sirrer, #watsebacket, #not maid, #laziness
Transcript
Carol: "Hey! You left a used coffee stirrer on the counter!!!" Wally: "The wastebasket was one foot away! I am an associate not your maid!!!" "Behold the power of laziness." Carol: "So, I'll throw it away for you THIS TIME."
Monday October 22,
2007
Tags #security consulatant, #without id, #badge, #strip search, #confiscate wallet, #lock him janitors closet, #extreme, #living on mop water
Transcript
Dogbert the security consultant Dogbert: "If you see someone without an ID badge..." "...Strip search him, confiscate his wallet, and lock him in the janitor's closet until he starves!" The boss: "That seems a bit extreme." Dogbert: "You're about one minute away from living on mop water."
Tuesday February 23,
2016
Asok Needs Money And Social Life
Tags #ride share, #rideshare, #uber, #driver, #taxi, #job, #business
Transcript
Asok: I have no social life and I need extra money. What should I do? Wally: You're one Prius away from being an Uber driver. Narrator: Continued.
Saturday December 21,
2019
Thwarting Alice's Career
Tags #managers & supervisors, #mentor, #deny, #Promotion, #compete, #thwart, #career, #business
Transcript
alice: can you mentor me? boss: heck, no. you're only one promotion away from competing for my job. alice: well, maybe you could just stop thwarting my career? boss: no, same issue.
Monday October 28,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #can, #one, #believe, #dog, #industry, #suppose, #give, #it, #away
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert says, "Ten dollars . . . It's my final offer." Dogbert says, "Okay, but you can only use one hand." Dilbert pats Dogbert on the head. Dilbert says as he hands Dogbert ten dollars, "I don't believe this is now standard in the dog industry." Dogbert replies, "Oh, right, I suppose the others give it away."
Tuesday December 28,
1999
Tags #executive mba program, #one hour long, #degree, #prestigious university
Transcript
The boss, Wally and Dilbert are sitting at a table. The boss says: "I signed up for an executive MBA program." The boss says: "It's one-hour long and I get a degree from a prestigious university." The boss says: "I'd better run. I'm already a half-hour late."