Online Dating Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

213 Results for Online Dating

View 1 - 10 results for online dating comic strips. Discover the best "Online Dating" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dilbert Does Online Dating

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Does Online Dating - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, internet dating, low standards, online dating, triple threat, six feet tall, hair, height, job, business, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I got 9,752 responses on this dating site and I haven't even completed my profile. All I said is that I'm six feet tall, I have hair and a job. Meanwhile, everywhere: Women: Hair... height... job! Triple threat!

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags combined, dating service, online job site, system

View Transcript

Transcript

"I combined an online dating service with an online job site and an online auction site." "You tell the system everything about yourself and see if anyone wants any of it." ""I wouldn't date you or hire you, but I'll bid a dollar for your refrigerator.""

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags talking, woman, insane, crazy, dating, weird, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Hi. My name is?" Woman says, "Whoa! Whoa! Not in person!" Woman says, "I only meet men through online dating sites. That way I can filter out the losers." Dilbert says, "Too crazy too fast." Woman says, "I know. I'm working on that."

Wally Sees Tina On Tinder

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Sees Tina On Tinder - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags tinder, dating, online dating, attraction, awkward, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Hey, I saw you on Tinder. Tina: Please don't say anything else. Please don't say anything else. Wally: I swiped left. Tina: Gaaa!

Dating Is A B Testing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dating Is A B Testing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags analysis, comparison, dating, first date, judging, a-b testing, click with, analytics, measuring, too many questions, relationships, science

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: Have you been dating a lot? Dilbert: I call it A-B testing. I go on dates and then compare the analytics to see who I click with most.Woman: What exactly are you measuring? Dilbert: Asks too many questions.

Company Policy About Dating

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Company Policy About Dating - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, relationships, office romance, policy, legal issues, human resources, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Rumor has it that you are dating a co-worker named Loud Howard. Company policy requires you to register your lustful feelings with our legal department. Lawyer: Okay, I think we have you covered, but the stapling phase will sting a little.

Ceo Uses Dating App

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ceo Uses Dating App - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, app, technology, tinder, match, cheating, adultery, eskimo brothers, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I love this dating app. Wally: I thought you were married. CEO: I'm just looking. What's the worst thing that could happen? CEO: Hey, what's my wife doing on here? Wally: Your wife/?? That's my girlfriend!

Dating A Unicorn

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dating A Unicorn - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, dating, office, office workers, unicorn

View Transcript

Transcript

ted: i hear you're dating a unicorn. dilbert: that is absurd and untrue. ted: then how do you explain the fact that five people told me it was true? ted: i mean, you'd have to believe all five of them are idiots. dilbert: including you, it's six.

Dating In The Age Of Coronavirus

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dating In The Age Of Coronavirus - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags attractive, contract, covid-19, dating, eyes, goodnight, kiss, lawyers, mask, masked, negotiations, office workers, single, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

carol: it must be difficult to be single in the age of covid-19. dilbert: it's not too bad, actually. i'm in contract negotiations with a semi-attractive women i met online. with any luck, i will be enjoying a double-masked goodnight kiss by late next month. that assumes our lawyers don't make too many changes to the contract. carol: did you just say she is only semi-attractive? dilbert: i'm judging from the parts i can see. i don't know what's under the mask and shower cap she wears all day. carol: you must like her eyes. dilbert: i like the one i can see. the other one has a patch.

Online Class Muted

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Online Class Muted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, sarcasm, technology, online, training, diversity, inclusion, mute, course, confess, idiots

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: my records show you completed the online training for diversity and inclusion. apparently, you did not know we can detect it when you have the sound muted during the entire course. colleague: oops. dilbert: you can do that? Boss: no, but i can trick most of you idiots into confessing.