The Boss: We don't have formal training for your job. Just hang around and see if you can absorb it through osmosis.
Man: I'm an idiot for taking this job.
The Boss: You're already thinking like the rest of the staff!
"I surplussed Ted. You'll need to absorb his function."
"Absorb his function?"
"Are you telling me to do two jobs for one salary?"
"No, I'm telling you to absorb his function.. in an absorptive fashion."
"..Using osmosis, symbiosis, and synergy."
"Can you change reality by inventing new names for ordinary things?"
"I sure hope so. Otherwise my entire career has been a.. a.."
"Tragic series of monkey-brained mistakes?"