Patron Saint Comic Strips
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12 Results for Patron Saint
View 1 - 10 results for patron saint comic strips. Discover the best "Patron Saint" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday January 31,
1994
Tags #patron saint, #technology, #heal broken hearts, #demons, #stupidity, #spiritual side
Transcript
Dogbert: I declare myself the patron saint of technology. I heal broken technology with my right paw and I use the scepter to drive out the demons of stupidity. Dilbert: I don't think Ive seen your spiritual side before. Dogbert: OUT! OUT!
Thursday August 06,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #farmer, #windham, #saint theresa, #can, #varnish, #worshipers, #farm, #miracle, #admission, #quipped, #peanut butter, #bug
Transcript
Dogbert sits on the hassock watching television. The tv newscaster says, "A farmer in Windham claims that the face of Saint Theresa appeared in a can of varnish." The reporter continues, "Worshipers are flocking to the farm to witness the miracle. 'I should charge for admission' quipped the farmer." Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert enters holding a can of peanut butter and says, "Guess what I found in the peanut butter." Dilbert thinks, "Please, let it be a bug."
Friday August 07,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #happy face, #peanut butter, #saint ted, #ratbert, #booked, #new york, #saint theresa
Transcript
Dogbert and Ratbert stand outdoors. Dogbert shows Ratbert a can of peanut butter and says, "It's a miracle, Ratbert. The image of Saint Ted appeared in my jar of peanut butter!" Ratbert asks, "Saint Ted? Who ever heard of Saint Ted? Couldn't you get Saint Theresa?" Dogbert replies, "She was booked to a can of varnish in Upstate New York." Ratbert says, "Saint Ted looks like a 'happy face.'"
Saturday August 08,
1992
Tags #appearance, #refrigerator, #people, #Dogbert, #traveled, #miracle, #peanut butter, #saint ted, #jar, #elvis, #jello, #king
Transcript
A newsreporter stands on the lawn in front of Dilbert's house. She says, "People have traveled from all over to see the miracle of the peanut butter." Behind the reporter, people with outstretched arms walk toward the house. Dogbert stands on top of the refrigerator collecting money. Dogbert says, "Step right up . . . Just ten bucks to see the face of Saint Ted appearing in my jar of peanut butter." A man opens the fridge and says, "Ooh! And I see Elvis in the Jello!" Another man says, "Only the King moves like that!"
Tuesday February 01,
1994
Tags #saint dogbert, #technology, #demons, #stupidity, #make command, #easy to remeber, #software developer
Transcript
Saint Dogbert seeks out technology that has been possessed by the demons of stupidity. He Happens across a software developer. Man: I'll make the command easier to remember like CTRL- ALT-F4-DEL" and if they forget that they can just edit the source code in command. com perfect Dogbert: out! out!
Thursday February 03,
1994
Tags #evil demons, #stupidity, #saint dogbert, #image, #protect and wathc, #career change, #out demons of stupid
Transcript
Dogbert: "Is your job plagued by the evil demons of stupidity?" "Simply affix this image of Saint Dogbert to every document, cubicle or computer you want to protect and watch your career being to change!" "Out Out!! You demons of stupidity!!"
Monday September 26,
1994
Tags #saint dogbert, #priority matrix, #agenda
Transcript
"I invited Saint Dogbert to bludgeon anybody who strays from the agenda into something stupid." "That reminds me of the productization of our Tiger Team's priority matrix." "Actually, that was on the agenda." "Oops. Carry on."
Monday June 26,
1995
Tags #saint dogbert, #mediate, #dispute, #computers, #desert and seek, #enlightenment, #path of computing, #plan springs, #endorsement, #contract, #end of line
Transcript
The Boss says, "I asked Saint Dogbert to mediate our dispute over what kind of computers are allowed here." Dogbert stands behind him wearing a miter and holding a scepter. Looking down from the top of a file cabinet, Dogbert raises his arms and says, "I shall go to the desert and seek enlightenment. When I return I will reveal the true path of computing." The caption says, "Palm Springs." Dogbert is at a table with a man holding a suitcase full of money. Behind the man is a woman with a sack of money. Dogbert says to the man, "You call this an endorsement contract?! Go to the end of the line!"
Tuesday July 11,
1995
Tags #saint dogbert, #stale overused jokes, #information super highway, #roadkill, #super highway
Transcript
Dogbert, Alice, Wally and a man sit at a conference table. Dogbert is wearing a bishop's miter and holding a scepter. Dogbert announces, "I am Saint Dogbert. I have come to drive out the stale and overused jokes about the information superhighway." The man comments, "Sometimes I feel like roadkill on the information superhighway!" Dogbert knocks the man out with a blow to the head. Dogbert faces the reader and says, "Don't make me come over there!"
Thursday November 09,
1995
Tags #saint dogbert, #land of cubicles, #demons, #computer guru, #data base concepts, #monster, #dispatched, #actual code
Transcript
The caption says, "Saint Dogbert enters the Land of Cubicles searching for the demons of stupidity." Dogbert walks down the hall wearing a bishop's miter and holding a scepter. The caption says, "Suddenly he finds an over-promoted computer guru spouting useless database concepts." A man sits at a conference table with two glassy-eyed co-workers. The man says, "You'd be fools to ignore the boolean anti-binary least-square approach." The caption says, "The monster is dispatched to the dark world by the sight of its most feared object." Dogbert stands on the conference table holding a document in front of the man. Dogbert says, "Look! Actual code!" The man's head melts into his shirt and a co-worker says, "Cool!"