Per Wekk Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

97 Results for Per Wekk

View 1 - 10 results for per wekk comic strips. Discover the best "Per Wekk" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 09, 2005's comic on:


Tags #working 80 hours, #per wekk, #ground breaking, #starategies, #my underlings

View Transcript

Transcript

I'm working 80 hours per week and you hire someone to do your work??? "Leave him alone so he can think up groundbreaking strategies." "Such as?" "I changed your job title to 'My Underling's Underling.'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 19, 2011's comic on:


Tags #big business, #inventions, #google, #develop ideas, #60 hours, #per week, #math, #education

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: At Google, we're encouraged to spend 20% of our time developing our own ideas. Dilbert: How many hours per week do you work? Man: About sixty. Wally: It sounds better when you don't do the math.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 19, 1996's comic on:


Tags #consultant, #highly paid, #150 per hour, #ideal career, #unproductive, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert leans on Wally's monitor and says, "As a consultant, I earn $150 per hour even when I'm unproductive." Ratbert continues, "I can earn 42 cents by wiggling my furry little behind for ten seconds." Ratbert shouts, "C'mon, count with me!!!" Wally tells Dilbert, "When I imagine my ideal career, it's never like this."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 1998's comic on:


Tags #rather the consultant, #200k per year

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: Ratbert the Consultant. Ratbert sits at a conference table between a man and a woman. Ratbert says, "I'm making $200,000 per year!" Ratbert whistles. Ratbert says, "Apparently that's all I know." The man and the woman look annoyed.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 19, 2001's comic on:


Tags #soul mates, #one per person, #everyone gets one, #monkey, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: I believe there is one true soul mate for every person. Dilbert: He must be very busy. Tina: I meant one per person. your way would be stupid. Dilbert: Can your should mate be a monkey?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 15, 2002's comic on:


Tags #30 thousand employees, #emails jokes per week, #file bankruptcy, #lost prodcutivity, #ten million, #holding employee responsible

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert says to Tina, "Tina, our records show that you forward an average of nineteen e-mail jokes per week." Catbert continues, "Each joke goes to 30,000 employees, costing us ten million per year in lost productivity." Catbert concludes, "We plan to blame you when we file for bankruptcy next week." Tina is visibly worried.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 28, 2003's comic on:


Tags #business card orders, #downsized, #3 per week, #possibility of leaving, #rates, #fees, #calculations

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert approaches Carol and asks, "How many business cards should I order?" Carol responds, "It depends." Carol continues, "I use a complex formula based on your burn rate and your likelihood of getting downsized." Dilbert says, "I use about three per week." Carol replies, "You'll need three cards."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 19, 2008's comic on:


Tags #rumor control, #paid per rumor, #terrorit training campo, #exotic dancer, #weekends

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "I'm from the Dogbert Rumor Control Service." Dogbert says, "People are saying Ted is an exotic male dancer on weekends. I know it isn't true because he spends all of his free time in a terrorist training camp." Alice says, "Isn't that worse?" Dogbert says, "I get paid per rumor. It's not a perfect system."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 2008's comic on:


Tags #cooked books, #pension fund, #15% per year, #crooks, #optimists, #whistling noise, #soul escaping

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "I cooked the books by assuming your pension fund will earn 15% per year." Pension Fund 15% Dogbert says, "Technically you aren't crooks, just optimists." Tweet! Mmph! Tweet! Dogbert says, "If you hear a whistling noise, that would be your soul escaping through your nose."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 15, 2005's comic on:


Tags #400 per hour, #expensive, #ball rolling, #process using, #recommendations

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Mister Dogbert has agreed to consult for $400 per hour. "I know it's expensive but you get what you pay for." "Let's get the ball rolling." "My first question is: what process will you be using to arrive at your recommendations?" Dogbert: "a..." "very...slow one..."