Pessimist Comic Strips
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5 Results for Pessimist
View 1 - 5 results for pessimist comic strips. Discover the best "Pessimist" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday January 03,
1991
Tags #murder, #forever, #safe, #optimist, #pessimist, #1957, #due
Transcript
Dilbert sits in a chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, "Our town hasn't had a murder since 1957." The caption says, "Definition of an optimist." Dilbert thinks, "We're safe forever." The caption says, "Definition of a pessimist." Dogbert thinks, "We're due."
Thursday January 30,
1997
Tags #glass half empty, #half in another glass, #lips on glass, #optimist half full, #redundant glass
Transcript
Ratbert stands on a desk looking at a glass of water. He says, "A pessimist says the glass is half empty. An optimist says it's half full." Dilbert asks, "Did you put your lips on my glass again?" Ratbert says, "And the engineer says . . ." Dilbert says, "It's a good thing I put half of my water in a redundant glass."
Wednesday June 10,
2015
Doomed Smartwatch Project
Tags #analogy, #obliviousness, #assignment, #technology, #invention, #watch, #failure
Transcript
Boss: You'll be in charge of our smart watch project. Dilbert: ...that is doomed from the start. Boss: Stop being such a pessimist. Dilbert: Said General Custer to his horse. Boss: Why would he talk to his horse? Dilbert: Because even the horse knew something was wrong!
Tuesday November 10,
2015
Not Saving Enough For Retirement
Tags #money, #saving, #retirement, #bleak, #despair, #pessimist, #old people, #elderly
Transcript
Wally: Most people are not saving enough for retirement. So I see no reason to work hard and save money just so my retirement condo can be overrun by starving seniors. Too bleak? Alice: A little!
Saturday September 01,
2018
Glass Is Half Full
Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #the boss, #glass, #half empty, #half full, #the engineer, #pie hole
Transcript
The Boss: A pessimist says the glass is half empty. An optimist says it is half full. Dilbert: The engineer says the glass is too big. The Boss: The manager says the engineer should shut his pie hole.