Photo Convention Comic Strips

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31 Results for Photo Convention

View 1 - 10 results for photo convention comic strips. Discover the best "Photo Convention" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogebrt attorney, #best defense, #ignorant, #stock manipulation, #convince judge, #dumber than chocolate, #outdoor las vegas, #photo convention

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Headline: Dogbert the Attorney. Dogbert says to The Boss, "Your best defense is to say you were ignorant of your company's stock manipulation." Dogbert continues, "We need to convince a judge that you're dumber than chocolate pants at an outdoor Las Vegas photography convention." The Boss replies, "I don't get that." Dogbert says, "E-E-Excellent."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #photo, #proof, #completed, #hit-man, #contract, #Dilbert, #sitting, #lifeless, #stuffed, #chair, #looks, #watching, #technically, #kill, #prove, #life

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Dogbert hands a photograph to a man behind a desk and says, "Here is photo proof that I completed my hit-man contract on Dilbert." The man replies, "Excellent." Dogbert says, "Here he is, sitting lifeless in his stuffed chair." The man looks at the picture and says, "It looks like he's just watching television." Dogbert says, "Technically, my contract doesn't say I must kill him. It says I must 'prove he has no life.'"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #ugly, #people, #convention, #town, #cruel, #male, #bonding, #fertilizer, #face, #first, #time, #bruce, #dates, #wife, #children, #poker, #nights

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Dilbert stands in the hall talking to a co-worker. Another man walks up and says, "It looks like the ugly people's convention is in town." The man asks, "How are you two cow pies doing? Huh?" Dilbert asks, "Why are you always so cruel, Brad?" Brad replies, "It's not cruel! This is male bonding, you fertilizer face!" Brad continues, "Try it; it'll make you feel like a man for the first time!" Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Okay, did you know that Bruce dates your wife on your poker nights?" Brad and Bruce look shocked. Brad and Bruce fight each other. Dilbert adds, "And your children are funny looking - especially Becky." Dilbert walks away thinking, "He's right. That felt good."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mail sent, #bag, #often flier status, #seat upgrade, #overhead bin, #disaster averted, #colicky baby convention, #other passengers

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Dilbert stands at the Happy Airlines check-in counter. He hands the ticket agent a sack and says, "This bag contains all the mail you've sent me about my 'Often Flier' status." Dilbert continues, "I'll trade everything in the bag for a seat upgrade. I'm currently assigned to an overhead bin." The woman looks in the bag and says, "Okay." Dilbert hands his boarding pass to an agent and thinks, "Whew! Disaster has been averted." The man standing behind Dilbert holds two infants. He asks the woman behind him, "Are you guys going to the colicky baby convention too?"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #discount brokerage, #open an account, #money eveaporates, #photo synthesis, #yes haw

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DISCOUNT BROKERAGE: Dogbert says to a prospective customer, "You can only open an account if you meet my stringent requirements." Dogbert says, "True or false: Money evaporates because of photo-synthesis." The prospective customer replies, "True?" Dogbert says, "You're in." The customer thinks, "Don't yell yee-haw!"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #feedback, #website design, #computer, #eyes wide, #psychopath, #photo wall, #toe fungus, #despair, #yell, #mouth open, #scared, #pain, #satan, #licking, #brain, #tone down, #hair stand up, #technology

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Tina says, "I need your honest feedback on our new website design." Asok says, "The layout looks like a psychopath's photo wall. The colors remind me of toe fungus and despair." Tina says, "I'll say, 'needs work.'" Asok says, "It feels like Satan is licking my brain!"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coworker, #favor, #hairless potter, #harry potter, #drinking coffee, #magic, #social convention, #awe, #excitement, #baldemort

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Coworker says, "Wally, will you do me a favor?" Wally says, "Absolutely. What are friends for?" Wally says, "After all, you'd do a favor for me if I asked, right?" Coworker says, "Um? sure." Wally says, "Of course you would." Wally says, "So do me a favor and don't ask me to do any favors." Coworker says, "Wow. Okay. I did not see that coming." Asok says, "You're like a wizard who uses the rules of social convention as if they are magic." Asok says, "You're Hairless Potter!" Wally says, "Don't tell Baldemort."

Lonely Man

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Lonely Man - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #zoom, #discuss, #issue, #video call, #voice call, #attractive, #lonely, #Women, #man, #remote, #work from home, #cell phone, #linkedin, #profile, #photo

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dilbert on couch with cell phone texting. dilbert texting: let's do a zoom call to discuss that issue. tap tap tap other person's response: you only want to do a video call because i'm an attractive woman and you are a lonely single man working remotely. will you settle for a voice call while you stare at my linkedin profile photo? dilbert: yes

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #announcements, #committee decided, #file naming, #month, #year, #day, #space, #temperature, #airport, #hat size, #long meeting, #best work

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Ted: The committee decided that the file naming convention will start with the date, in the order of month, year, day... then a space, then the temperature at the airport, and the hat size of the nearest squirrel. To be perfectly honest, it was a long meeting and we probably didn't do our best work toward the end.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #uncle phil, #hang glided, #tree, #hang gliding

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Dilbert shows Dogbert a photo album and says, "This is Uncle Phil before he died hang gliding." Dogbert asks, "Did he hit a tree?" Dilbert replies, "Let's just say he didn't read the hang glider manual very carefully." Uncle Phil stands on top of a hang glider with a noose around his neck. The other end of the rope is attached to a tree. He thinks, "I wonder if there's another reason it's called hang gliding. Nah . . ."