Planting False Memories Comic Strips
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61 Results for Planting False Memories
View 1 - 10 results for planting false memories comic strips. Discover the best "Planting False Memories" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 10,
2000
Tags #skydiving, #planting false memories, #subconscious, #college, #education
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert are sitting on the sofa. Dogbert, who is sitting atop the back of the couch, asks Dilbert "Remember the time you went skydiving?" Dilbert replies with the TV remote in hand, "No." Dogbert says, "You will. I'm planting false memories in your subconscious." Dilbert replies, "It won't work." Dogbert says, "But you believe you went to college, right?"
Saturday February 26,
2000
Tags #bob flabeau, #lifetime gullibility awar, #biograohy, #false memeories, #herbal therapist, #solid gold
Transcript
Dogbert is standing on a stool at a podium. He announces: "The Lifetime Gullibility Award goes to Bob Flabeau." He continues: "I would read Bob's biography but it's comprised entirely of false memories planted by his herbal therapist." Dogbert holds out the award as Bob Flabeau walks eagerly up to claim it. Dogbert says to him: "It looks like a stick but it's solid gold." Bob exclaims: "Wow!"
Sunday April 13,
2014
Tags #close friends, #facebook, #fix problem, #friends, #liked, #posts, #seven friends, #therapy, #shrink, #popularity, #social media, #technology, #psychology
Transcript
Dilbert: No one "likes" my Facebook posts. woman: How many Facebook friends do you have? Dilbert: Seven. Woman: Are they close friends? Dilbert: How do you define close? Woman: Have you here invited any of these people to your house? Dilbert: Why would I do that? Woman: I can't fix your problem. SO instead , I'll plant some false memories and try to fox those later. Do you remember being a robot that was designed by alines? Dilbert: No. woman: are you sure? Dilbert: I was.
Sunday July 29,
2018
Tags #conversation, #assumption, #arguing, #logic, #argument
Transcript
Man: You said the software would be finished by today. Dilbert: I said it might be finished by today. Man: Why did you say it might be finished if you knew it wouldn't? Dilbert: I didn't know it wouldn't be finished. Man: Now you're flip-flopping all over the place. Dilbert: You're conflating your own false memories with my actions. Man: That's exactly what liars say. Dogbert: How was work? Dilbert: Totally normal. Unfortunately.
Saturday July 25,
2020
False Modesty
Tags #business, #universities & colleges, #education, #harvard, #false, #modesty, #major, #face mask
Transcript
dilbert wearing face mask: what college did you go to? colleague wearing face mask: i'd rather not say. dilbert: the only people who answer that way are people who went to harvard. do they teach you false modesty? colleague: it was my major.
Saturday March 26,
2011
Tags #prejudice, #universities & colleges, #updating employee profiles, #school. indian institute of technology, #double major, #engineering, #false humility, #combined thesis, #terraformed planet
Transcript
Carol says, "Hey, Asok. I'm updating our employee profiles. Where'd you go to school?" Asok says, "I graduated from the Indian Institute of Technology in Lucknow with a double major in engineering and physics, and a minor in false humility." Asok says, "For my combined thesis I terraformed a planet in another dimension and didn't tell anyone." Carol says, "I'll put 'Indian.'"
Thursday October 24,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #high school, #yearbook, #brings, #memories, #dopey, #noober, #flagpole, #live, #frogs, #pants, #principal, #happiest, #guy, #ever, #known
Transcript
Dilbert leans against the hassock looking at a yearbook. Dilbert says, "This high school yearbook really brings back the memories." Dilbert shows Dogbert the yearbook and says, "There's Dopey Bobby Noober. Every day we'd tie him to the flagpole and stuff live frogs in his pants." Dogbert asks, "Where is he now?" Dilbert replies, "He's still the principal . . . Not the happiest guy I've ever known."
Wednesday March 18,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #rabert, #false, #humility, #weasel, #compliments, #insult
Transcript
Ratbert and Dogbert sit on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I've been using false humility to weasel compliments out of people . . ." Dogbert continues, "But I know YOU're way too smart to fall for that trick, Ratbert." Ratbert replies, "Actually, I'm as dumb as toast." Dogbert says, "Then I found I could use false compliments to make people insult themselves."
Saturday October 03,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #strange, #dream, #nosebleed, #supressing, #memories, #abducted, #aliens, #hypnosis, #scorned
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert holds a pen and a pad of paper. Dogbert asks, "Have you ever had a strange dream or a nosebleed?" Dilbert replies, "Yes." Dogbert says, "It's clear that you're suppressing memories of being abducted by aliens. I can use hypnosis to get at those memories." Dilbert asks, "What if the hypnosis itself makes me think it happened when it didn't? I'll be scorned and ridiculed for life." Dogbert replies, "That's a risk I'm willing to take."
Thursday July 14,
1994
Tags #carpal tunnel, #health care, #money, #surgery, #constant agony, #false alarm, #medical
Transcript
Employee: So now I have carpal tunnel syndrome... The Boss: ZZZZ Employee: you don't care about the health of your employees! All you care about is money!! The Boss: money? Employee: I need surgery! Im in constant again!! The boss: False alarm. zzz