Pulling Rank Comic Strips
24 Results for Pulling Rank
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CEO: Im running late. But since Im a Vice president. you'll have to wait in the hallway. You'll be able to judge your relative worth by observing what thing I do while you wait. Dilbert: He's teaching himself banjo.
Asok: Who will present my findings to the board of directors?" The Boss: They only listen to the CEO. And he only listens to the senior vice presidents, and they only listen to the... Asok: Could you show this to the janitor for me?" RatBert: Whoa! Whoa! You don't talk to me directly!"
Dilbert: I don't know how to answer your question because I got here late and I haven't deduced your rank in the company. Woman: I'm the new director of Marketing, so you need to pretend my question makes sense. Dilbert: Give me a minute to get into that mindset. Woman: Take your time.
Dilbert: Google found out that we used fake links to boost our search rank. Now our website only shows up when someone enters the search string "dung for brains." Boss: They won't get away with this! Computer: Shut your pie hole.
Dilbert: I want to buy your company's product but it's like pulling teeth with you. Man: Ha ha! I switched from commissions to a guaranteed salary. I'm free from the tyranny of customer service! Dilbert: This is less than ideal. Man: No paperwork for me! Woot! Woot!
Carol stands behind Alice who is at her computer. Carol says, "I'm taking your urgent document to the overnight drop box, with nine minutes to spare." Carol says, "The box is only eight minutes away. I'll stop for coffee first." Alice grimaces. Carol says, "Don't worry. If the truck is pulling away from the box, I'll wedge this in the back bumper." Carol holds out Alice's report. Alice makes the fists of death.
Dogbert and Brett walk toward each other on the sidewalk. Dogbert says to the little boy, "Hi, Brett. What do you have there?" Brett, who is pulling a wagon with a bomb on it, replies, "Hydrogen bomb!!" Dogbert says, "Be careful. You could kill people with that thing." Brett says, "Really? Cool!" Brett pushes the bomb and says, "That's a great suggestion!" Dogbert walks away saying, "I've done better . . ."
"I got a job as the head of market research at your company. I'll be pulling down $120 K per year." "I don't value otehr people's opinions so I'll just use my own." "Just for reference, how much does honesty pay these days?" "Shut up."
Dilbert and Wally sit at a conference table. Both of them look like they have been burned in a fire. Dilbert says, "My status report is a bit light this week because I'm having an e-mail flame war with Wally." Dilbert continues angrily, "Wally refuses to admit my technical superiority or his simian ancestry. It is my obligation to set him straight." Wally shakes his fist at Dilbert and shouts, "NEVER!!" Dilbert says, "I'm thinking this somehow elevates my rank in the herd and improves my mating possibilities." Wally says, "We're victims of hormones."
Dilbert: One more adjustment and my trans-dimensional radio will be complete. Man: Welcome to the land of overused phrases. Man 2: Boy, they let any-body in here. Dilbert: Uh... Hi, how are you? Both Men: Not bad for a Wednesday! Man 1: Let me give you the tencent tour. Man 2: OUch! I"ll just walk on the bottoms. Dogbert: You know, swimming is the best form of exercise. Both Men: The chosen one!! Dogbert: Nah. I'm just pulling your legs.