Pure Luck Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

107 Results for Pure Luck

View 1 - 10 results for pure luck comic strips. Discover the best "Pure Luck" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #frustration, #wages, #bounuses, #usual formula, #pure luck, #performance, #huge consumer demand, #bad job, #marketing, #engineers, #bonus, #hard wrok, #business, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Your bonuses this year will be based on the usual formula. 50% is based on pure luck. And 50% is based on the performance of people you have never met. This year, the luck factor was good. Our industry experienced huge consumer demand. Unfortunately, people who you have never met did a bad job of marketing and sales are terrible. And for that, you engineers must be punished. No bonuses for you. Luckily for me, my bonus is based on how well I can convince you idiots to work hard while getting no bonuses. I don't like to brag, but I'm fairly sure I'm nailing it.

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Asok Asks How Much Is Luck

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Asok Asks How Much Is Luck - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #nepotism, #luck, #success, #obliviousness, #rich people, #privilege

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: May I ask some questions about your journey to success? Boss: I don't like the sound of this. Asok: I am trying to ascertain what percentage of a person's success is pure luck. For example, who hired you for your first real job? Boss: My dad. But in my defense, I interview well.

You Make Luck

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
You Make Luck - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #luck, #wisdom, #rewiring, #super, #employee, #double, #workload, #brain, #rewire, #monster

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: remember, asok, you don't find luck, you go out and make it. asok yelling and waving arms: i feel your wisdom rewiring my brain and turning me into a super-employee! boss: it usually doesn't work this fast. asok: please double my workload, you beautiful monster!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #luck, #lemons, #lemonade, #citrus, #allergic, #swell, #die

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors. Dilbert says, "I have no luck." Dogbert says, "You know what they say, 'If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.'" Dilbert replies, "I'm allergic to citrus." Dogbert says, "You know what they say, 'If life gives you lemons, swell up and die.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #lab, #growth, #hair, #luck, #formula, #engineer, #inventor

View Transcript

Transcript

A door is marked "Dilbert's Lab." Dilbert walks out of the lab door. He has hair growing all over his body. Dogbert asks, "Any luck with your hair growth formula?" Dilbert replies, "Define 'luck.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #snow, #mountain, #jet, #captain, #bob, #fly, #luck, #survive, #eat, #cannibal, #last

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Dogbert and several other passengers stand in waist-deep snow. Dilbert says, "We're alive . . . We must have been thrown clear when the jet hit the mountain." The airplane captain says to Dilbert, "I'm Captain Bob. Sorry about the crash. What are the odds I'd hit this same mountain on every flight?" As Bob walks away Dilbert says, "We're in luck. Captain Bob knows how to survive these situations." Bob thinks, "Nice folks. I'll eat them last."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #stock market, #Dogbert, #bad luck, #tragedy, #fortune, #joy, #pain, #compensate, #good luck, #friend

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dilbert's head is bandaged and his arm is in a sling. Dilbert says, "I've had nothing but tragedy since making a fortune in the stock market." Dilbert continues, "Sometimes, Dogbert, it seems like our lives have preset balances of joy and pain; when one gets too high the other kicks in to compensate." Dilbert continues, "But through it all, I always have you, my friend." Dogbert replies, "At least until my good luck kicks in."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #unimportant, #requires, #action, #route, #subordinate, #inflating, #perceived, #importance, #destroying, #morale, #productivity, #luck, #copies

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss sits at his desk looking through a stack of documents and thinking, "Here's something else that's totally unimportant yet requires action." The Boss thinks, "I'll route it to a subordinate, thus inflating its perceived importance and destroying both morale and productivity." The Boss thinks, "What luck, I got two copies!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alien, #Dilbert, #disguise, #Dogbert, #media, #power, #space, #luck, #idiiots, #invader

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert enters wearing a pair of antennae and asks, "What do you think of my disguise?" Dogbert continues, "I'm going to tell the media that I'm a space alien with unstoppable powers. With luck, the nations of the world will surrender without a fight." Dilbert asks, "You think people are idiots . . . Don't you?" Dogbert shows Dilbert a photograph and says, "This is what I looked like before the disguise."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad luck, #lottery tickets, #fabulous wealth, #delight, #hedonistic, #yesterdays date, #old, #expired, #scam, #scammer, #cheater, #rat, #dog, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

"Value priced lottery tickets" Ratbert: "I am drawn by the allure of fabulous wealth and a life of hedonistic delight...one please." "This is dated yesterday." Dogbert: "Ooh, bad luck. Try again?"