Reasonable Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

25 Results for Reasonable

View 1 - 10 results for reasonable comic strips. Discover the best "Reasonable" comics from Dilbert.com.

Reasonable Assumptions

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Reasonable Assumptions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #plan, #reasonable, #unreasonable, #assumptions, #job, #face mask, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert wearing face mask: i ran the numbers, and your plan does not work under any reasonable set of assumptions. boss wearing face mask: have you tried "unreasonable assumptions?" dilbert: why would i do that? boss: well, to keep your job, for example.

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #company lawyer, #contract, #reasonable man, #interpretation, #squash, #bug

View Transcript

Transcript

"Company Lawyer." "This contract would be subject to a 'reasonable man' interpretation." "Where is this guy? I'll squash him like a bug!" "Okay, moving on..." "It's you! I knew it!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #software changes, #reflexively disagree, #reasonable

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Did you make the software changes I suggested? Coworker: No, because I reflexively disagree with ever suggestion that anyone ever makes. Dilbert: You're very reasonable. Coworker: No, I'm a total jer... wait, what did you just do there?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #apologize for efficiency, #apology, #how far, #meeting, #reasonable assumptions, #timeline for deployment, #vacation, #without knowledge of insight, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: Let's figure out a timeline for development. Dilbert: Ted is the only one who knows anything about that. And he's on vacation. The boss: Let's see how far we can get without Ted. Alice: You mean without knowledge or insight? The boss: We can make reasonable assumptions. Dilbert: Or we could wait for Ted to come back tomorrow and ask him.. The boss: I called this meeting and it's not a meeting until someone's time gets wasted! Dilbert: I apologize for my efficiency. The boss: Apology accepted.

App For Jumping Off The Roof

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
App For Jumping Off The Roof - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mind control, #technology, #invention, #suicide, #murder, #legal issues, #reasonable doubt

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Maybe we should remove the neural interface so his natural brain works again. Alice: Or... and this is just a thought-- we could create an app that makes him jump off the roof. Dilbert: Would that be murder or suicide? Alice: All we need is reasonable doubt.

Reasonable Doubt

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Reasonable Doubt - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #employees, #health, #leader, #coronavirus, #indoor, #face mask, #kill, #doubt, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: that stupid coronavirus is no match for a healthy, young leader such as yourself. freedom demands that you go to crowded indoor places without wearing your mask. boss: are you trying to kill me? carol: i'd say there's reasonable doubt.

Think About Long Term

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Think About Long Term - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #long term, #dynamics, #reasonable, #random, #decision, #job, #employment

View Transcript

Transcript

office worker: we need to think longer term about how all of these dynamics play out. dilbert: sounds reasonable. what exactly were we doing before? office worker: i can't speak for anyone else, but i was making random decisions and hoping i'd change jobs before anyone found out.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fee, #how the future works, #portfolio, #retirement planning, #understanding future

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's retirement planning service Dogbert: My fee is 10% of your portfolio per year. Employee: Sounds reasonable. Dogbert: None of my clients understand how the future works.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #trial, #judge, #Dogbert, #jury, #Men, #Women, #civil suit

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to the members of the jury, "Before you decide who wins this civil suit, remember this . . ." Dogbert continues, "I can't legally offer you large cash kick-backs for deciding in my favor. But please take a moment to complete a self-addressed stamped envelope." The judge asks, "What are you doing?" Dogbert replies, "I'm trying to establish 'reasonable doubt.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #thermostat wars, #warm for you, #too hot, #compromise, #temprature, #shirtless men

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Thermostat wars." Wally stands behind Alice's desk wearing only a tie and his underwear. He says, "Be reasonable, Alice. When it's warm enough for you, it's too hot for normal humans." Wally continues, "Logically, you could wear a sweater. But there's nothing I can do to be less warm. Therefore, you must compromise." Dilbert asks, "Did she buy the argument?" Dilbert is also wearing a tie and boxer shorts. Wally holds a mirror and an electric razor. He replies, "No. But I'm going to shave my back and take another run at it."