Revised Timeline Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

22 Results for Revised Timeline

View 1 - 10 results for revised timeline comic strips. Discover the best "Revised Timeline" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #vacation schedule, #cost estimates, #teds input, #revised timeline, #office supplies, #store, #pens, #limited selction, #excellent prices, #vacation next week

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: "May I see the vacation schedule?" Carol: "Why do you want it?" Wally: "No reason." "Well, Ted, I hope you're enjoying your vacation." The Boss: "Wally, do you have the cost estimates?" Wally: "I'm waiting for Ted's input. He's on vacation." The Boss: "How about the revised time-line?" Wally: "I'm waiting for Ted." "Do you need any office supplies? I'm going to the store." Dilbert: "Maybe some pens." TED Wally: "Limited selection but excellent prices." Dilbert: "Thanks." Wally: "So, I understand you have a vacation next week."

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #administrative agencies, #project timeline, #waste one week, #set up meeting, #available in a week

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I estimated the project timeline by assuming that everyone involved will waste one week. Boss: That's a stupid way to do a timeline. Set up a meeting and I'll show you how it's supposed to be done. Carol: He's available in a week.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #obliviousness, #obstinacy, #office workers, #whiteboard, #conference room, #prohject timeline, #zombie reflex mode

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Don't clean the whiteboard in the conference room. It has my project timeline. Janitor: I can't promise that. I slip into a sort of zombie reflex mode when I do this job. Dilbert: I envy you. Janitor: Would you like a few minutes to say goodbye to your timeline?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #revised standard employment agreement, #only company, #pudding head, #attitude, #lawyes, #rabies, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss hands Dilbert a document and says, "Here's the revised standard employment agreement. Sign it or be fired." Dilbert reads, "This agreement is between the Company (hereafter referred to as 'The Only Company That Would Ever Hire You') and you (hereafter called 'Pudding Head')." Dilbert says, "It seems to have a bit of attitude." The Boss responds, "Our lawyers turned on us. I suspect rabies."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #negative number, #square root, #strategic plan, #timeline, #mobius strip

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in the boss' office. Dilbert says, "I found some numbers that support your strategic plan." Dilbert looks at a piece of paper and says, "I had to take the square root of a negative number to do it." Dilbert says, "The timeline is on the mobius strip." The boss says, "Good work."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #emplyees, #org limbo, #return calls, #revised org chart, #beautiful

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Dogbert and the boss are sitting at a small round table. Dogbert is wearing a turban with a quarter-moon on it. He says, "I can contact employees who are in org-limbo." Alice appears beside them standing and saying, "Hello-o-o! Why doesn't anyone return my calls?" Dogbert is holding up a chart in front of Alice and shouts, "Come toward the revised chart, Alice!" Alice says, "It's so beautiful!" Dilbert and the boss, run off scared.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anne l. retentive, #task, #deliverable, #task not verb, #falling apart, #timeline project

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Anne L. Retentive. Anne is sitting at her desk. The Boss approaches from behind and startles her. He says, "Anne, I'm going to task you with a deliverable." Anne exclaims, "Gaaa!! Task is not a verb!! My world is falling apart!" The Boss smirks. As he's walking away, The Boss thinks to himself, "Tomorrow I'll ask her to timeline her project."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #mulitask, #one person, #schedule, #second task, #two task, #write a patch, #timeline

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: How do I make this software schedule one persons to two task at the same time? I can write a patch that inserts new months in the timeline. The Boss: and the second task is due on the fifteenth of Floopuary.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #apologize for efficiency, #apology, #how far, #meeting, #reasonable assumptions, #timeline for deployment, #vacation, #without knowledge of insight, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: Let's figure out a timeline for development. Dilbert: Ted is the only one who knows anything about that. And he's on vacation. The boss: Let's see how far we can get without Ted. Alice: You mean without knowledge or insight? The boss: We can make reasonable assumptions. Dilbert: Or we could wait for Ted to come back tomorrow and ask him.. The boss: I called this meeting and it's not a meeting until someone's time gets wasted! Dilbert: I apologize for my efficiency. The boss: Apology accepted.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fraternization, #meetings, #emails, #no one responded, #project timeline, #consensus nor reality, #illusion of progress

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Once again, none of you responded to my emails this past week. So I put together a project time line that reflects neither consensus nor reality. Wally: Can I have a copy so I can mock it? Dilbert: No, I'm still enjoying the illusion of progress.