Same Building Comic Strips
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487 Results for Same Building
View 1 - 10 results for same building comic strips. Discover the best "Same Building" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday May 12,
1994
Tags #all assignments, #big binder, #same building, #president, #good word, #two good words
Transcript
"Ratbert the consultant" "It looks like you've all done your assignments for me." "Your input is so important that I'll have it put in a big binder in stored in the same building that your president works!" "And I'll put in a good word for you when I meet with your boss later today." "Wink, thumbs up" "How about two good words?"
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Wednesday September 25,
1996
Tags #iron man team, #team building, #exercise, #ten mile swim, #parcticing, #teamwork, #doggie paddle, #health
Transcript
Wally, Dilbert and Alice stand on the beach wearing swimsuits. The Boss tells them, "The first leg of the 'Iron Man' team-building exercise is a ten-mile swim, I think." The Boss says, "I won't be participating because my teamwork skills are already excellent." The Boss thinks, "Two phrases you don't expect to hear in the same day are 'Iron Man' and 'doggie paddle.'" Someone in the water says, "Hey! No splashing!"
Sunday June 25,
1995
Tags #over worked, #engineer, #more work, #too many projects, #success impossible, #same result, #honk honk, #inventory, #office building, #engineering
Transcript
The Boss, Dilbert and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss hands Alice a paper and says, "Take care of this, Alice." Alice says, "'Take care of this'? This would double my workload." Alice says, "I've already got so many projects that I can't do anything useful with any of them." Alive continues, "But if success is impossible then . . . I'm . . free . ." Alice laughs and shouts, "Free! Free!" Alice sings, "The result will be the same no matter what I do! Yes yes yes." Alice grabs the Boss's hair and says, "Honk honk!" The Boss says, "Moving along . . . We need to inventory our office equipment." Dilbert says, "Sounds like a job for Alice."
Sunday May 05,
2002
Tags #socialize, #getting buy in, #dialoging for feedback, #building consensus, #temperature check, #straw man, #inoculate stakeholders, #letter from sa
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "You need to socialize your idea with the rest of the department." Dilbert replies, "Socialize? Is that the same as getting buy-in?" The Boss answers, "It's one step below buy-in. It's more like dialoging for feedback." Dilbert says, "Wait...I thought that building consensus was one step below buy- in." The Boss responds, "Just run it up a flagpole and see who salutes." Dilbert asks, "Wouldn't it be better to do a temperature check using a straw man?" The Boss answers, "Maybe... But is that going to inoculate the stakeholders?" A letter from Scott Adams reads, "Dear Reader, If you or anyone you love understands the preceding conversation, you have my deepest sympathy." Signed, "S.A."
Tuesday March 13,
2018
Team Building Lunch
Tags #lunch, #team, #teamwork, #team-building, #business
Transcript
Dilbert: Is everyone ready to go to lunch yet? I've been waiting for ninety minutes. Alice: We just got back. No one noticed you weren't with us. Dogbert: How was your team-building lunch? Dilbert: Suboptimal.
Thursday April 05,
2018
Team Building Dance
Tags #team-building, #dance, #rules, #restrictions, #Fun
Transcript
Boss: This year's team-building event will be a dance. No alcohol will be served. The event is for employees only, and you're not allowed to touch each other. Have a great time. Dilbert: How?
Sunday October 11,
2020
Building Codes
Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #lab, #construction, #building, #codes, #stringent, #guarantee, #rain, #mayor, #campaign, #sarcasm, #face mask, #false, #hope, #phase
Transcript
boss: how's the new lab construction going? dilbert: i'm having some issues with the local building codes. they seem unnecessarily stringent. for example, we have to guarantee no rain touches the roof. boss: why? dilbert: no on knows. but if we donate to the mayor's campaign, the city will designate the roof a "horizontal wall." boss: and then we can begin construction? dilbert: no, that's just the beginnning of the false hope phrase.
Friday October 16,
2020
Protesters Surround Building
Tags #face mask, #fire, #lobby, #managers & supervisors, #office building, #protest, #protesters, #sign, #support, #business
Transcript
dilbert and boss looking out office window. dilbert: protesters have surrounded our building. boss: don't worry. i put a supportive sign in the lobby so they'll know we are on their side. dilbert: update: our nine lower floors are on fire. boss: maybe i should have used a bigger sign.
Wednesday February 16,
2011
Tags #managers & supervisors, #move to big building, #regular job, #so unimprotant, #won't be missed, #work on something, #month, #business
Transcript
The Boss says, "Tina, you'll be in charge of our move to the new building." Tina says, "That means you think my regular job is so unimportant that I won't be missed if I work on something else for a month." The Boss says, "If it makes you feel any better, this will take longer than a month."
Thursday November 03,
2011
Tags #depression (mental state), #despair, #ugly partment, #two ugly roomates, #ugly bus, #ugly building, #ugly cubicle, #eat lunch
Transcript
Asok: I live in an ugly apartment with two ugly roommates. Each workday I take an ugly bus to an ugly building and spend the entire day in my ugly cubicle. Dilbert: At least you get to eat lunch with us. Asok: I've said too much.