Satans Bowels Comic Strips
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The Boss says, "An Elbonian company bought our company yesterday." Dilbert says, "What?" The Boss says, "They promise they won't discriminate against non-Elbonians." An Elbonian says, "Hey, hatless spawn of Satan's bowels, put a head on this."
The caption reads, "Dilbert is trapped in the bowels of accounting." Dogbert says to a demonlike clerk, "I understand you have Dilbert in there. Free him, or else . . ." The clerk responds, "Else what?" Dogbert replies, "Or else I will put this cap on my head BACKWARDS! Your little hardwired accounting brain will explode just looking at it." Wearing the cap backwards, Dogbert approaches Dilbert who is still hanging over the pit. Dilbert asks, "What was that popping sound?" Dogbert answers, "A paradigm shifting without a clutch."
ASOK: There is an error on my tiny paycheck. It is four dollars too much. The Boss: Gasp! Now you must travel to the bowels of the bureaucracy to correct the injustice, Asok: or I could just keep it as a reward for my honesty. The Boss: Bowles I say!!
Dilbert says, "I'm in charge while our boss is on vacation. When can you format some reports for me?" Carol says, "I'll send you a link to a widget that shows the temperature in Satan's fireplace. When it hits 32o Fahrenheit, I'll get right on it." Dilbert says, "And I was worried that the power would go to my head." Carol says, "Not as fast as this stapler will."
Asok: I don't like the looks of this. BUREACRACY ASOK: I only want to correct a small payroll error. Can you help me? Troll: does it help if I glare ar you for disturbing my lunch?
Satan's Vendor "You'll have many benefits after our technology is irrevocably implemented in your network." "For example, when one of our products stops working, we'll blame another vendor within 24 hours." "Do you have free t-shirts?" "Yes. They're made of the finest allergens."
Satan's Vendor "Ha ha ha! Now that you've implemented our product, you are at our mercy." "We shall raise the price of upgrades and delay promised patches. There is nothing you can do about it. Nothing!" "Wow. You're fast with those scissors." "I scrap."
Boss: Please stop using email to express your colorful opinions of our marketing campaign. We don't need a discoverable record of you describing our advertising plan as "Pinocchio doing the backstroke in Satan's septic tank." Remember that capitalism without deniability is the same as poverty. Dilbert: Eh?
Wally says, "My project is unfunded, just the way I like it. Wally says, "I spend my entire say forwarding funny e-mails and lubricating my bowels with coffee." The boss says, "Allow me to explain something?" Wally says, "Better make it fast!"