Satellite Comic Strips

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16 Results for Satellite

View 1 - 10 results for satellite comic strips. Discover the best "Satellite" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 12, 2011's comic on:


Tags #computers & peripherals, #fraternization, #friends with ghots, #ghandi, #ghost personal page, #ghosts, #heaven, #internet & world wide web, #llincoln, #satellite pictures, #social media, #social network, #technology

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Dogbert: Our new product will be a social network for people who want to be friends with ghosts. We'll post satellite pictures on each ghost's personal page and say the photos were taken from heaven. Man: Abraham Lincoln posted new pictures. Woman: I'm chatting with Gandhi! Later.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #hypnotic, #powers, #supreme, #earth, #computer, #satellite

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Dogbert stands on the desk chair and says into a camera, "This is Dogbert . . . You are all under my hypnotic powers . . ." A satellite dish sits on the desk. Dogbert transmits to a satellite orbiting earth, "I am the supreme ruler of earth. You must all carry Dogbert posters and chant 'Dogbert is my king.'" Dogbert concludes, "That is all for now. If I think of anything else important I'll let you know." Ratbert enters holding a sign with Dogbert's picture on it and chanting, ". . . Is my king."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 01, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #hijacked, #satellite, #signal, #hypnotized, #picture, #retrospect, #amusing

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Dogbert stands on the desk chair in front of a video camera. Dilbert asks Dogbert, "May I have a word with you?" Dilbert is holding a Dogbert sign. Dilbert says, "I understand that you hijacked a satellite signal and hypnotized everybody to carry your picture and chant your name. That is not amusing." Later, Dilbert says to Ratbert, "In retrospect, I shouldn't have said 'that is not amusing.'" They are both wearing brassieres.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 25, 1994's comic on:


Tags #bad timing, #corporate offcie, #declared war, #french embassy, #satellite program, #slingshot

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Dilbert: The corporate office sent me to head up the Elbonian satellite launching program. Elbanian: ooh...bad timing. The french delivered their satellite early. we already tried to launch it with the town slingshot. Dilbert: It doesn't get much worse than this. Elbonain: It flattened the french embassy. They declared war an hour ago.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 26, 1997's comic on:


Tags #moms birthday, #wants nothing, #home entertainment theater, #50 inch screen, #surround sound, #satellite link, #toaster oven

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Dilbert and his mother stand in the kitchen. Dilbert asks, "What do you want for your birthday this year, Mom?" Dilbert's mother replies, "Oh, nothing. I have everything I need." Dilbert says, "Oh, c'mon. There must be something you want." His mother replies, "Well, one thing, but it's silly." They sit in chairs. Dilbert says, "You just name it." His mom replies, "Okay." Dilbert's mother says, "I'd like a home entertainment theatre with a fifty-inch screen, 'Thx' Surround Sound and a 600 KBPS satellite link to the Net so I can view adult pictures during the commercials." Dilbert replies, "I was thinking more along the lines of a new toaster oven." Dilbert's mother says, "Oh, that's exciting. I'll put it next to my other one and watch them fight it out." Dilbert says, "There's a real dark side to the information age." Dilbert's mother says, "Oh, and about the gift of life I gave you; you're welcome."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 1999's comic on:


Tags #attached tracking device, #compromise, #spy satellite, #radio network, #next weekend, #date tried to run, #nod once

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Dilbert takes his coat off at home. Dilbert says, to dogbert, "My date tried to run away, but I attached a tracking device to her coat." Dilbert holds a microphone and site by his computer. Dilbert says, "Now I'll just compromise a spy satellite and a radio network." Dilbert's date lies in bed at her house. Her radio says, "....So id next weekend is good, nod once."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 19, 1998's comic on:


Tags #goal to motivate, #build global satellite netwrok, #feel sdifferent, #Right, #energetic feeling, #pinned, #burning couch, #dizzy, #budget cuts

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The Boss and Dilbert sit at a table. The Boss hands Dilbert a piece of paper and says, "This is the goal that will motivate you for the next year." Dilbert reads from the piece of paper: "'Build a global satellite network. Budget: $12,000.'" Dilbert looks at the Boss and says, "Motivation feels much different from what I imagined." Dilbert continues, "I was expecting a light, energetic feeling." Dilbert continues speaking and illustrates with his hands, "But it's more like being pinned under a burning couch." Dilbert puts his hand to his head and says, "Whoo, I'm getting dizzy." Dilbert stands up slowly and says, "I'd better lie down until the motivation wears off." The Boss leaves the room with Dilbert lying on the table. The Boss says, "He's going to be trouble during the next round of budget cuts."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 18, 2004's comic on:


Tags #home theater, #dvd, #hd, #dvr, #satellite dish, #mp3, #widescreen, #universal remote, #people over, #turn on

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The Boss: "My new home theater is amazing." "It's got a dvd, hd, dvr, fm, satellite dish, mp3, widescreen tv, seven speakers and a universal remote." "It's fun to invite people over so they can show me how to turn it on."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 18, 2012's comic on:


Tags #crimes, #engineers, #engineering question, #holiday lights, #homeless guy, #catapult, #satellite map, #fell off roof, #flight oath, #neighbors pool, #broken leg, #heartless

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Boss: Do you have a minute to answer an engineering question? My wife is out of town visiting her sister. She asked me to put up the holiday lights while she was gone. I hired a homeless guy to do it and he fell off the roof. What's the easiest way to get rid of the body before my wife comes home? Dilbert: Your question is disturbing, but I'm intrigued by the engineering part. Here's a design for a catapult you can build at home. And here's a satellite map showing the best flight path to a neighbor's pool. Did he die right away? Boss: No, just a broken leg.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 21, 2013's comic on:


Tags #fear, #nasa, #tracking satellite, #asteroid

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Dilbert: I found a backdoor into NASA's asteroid tracking satellite. I see that a big one is heading directly toward... Gaaaa!!! Dogbert: What? What? Dilbert: I must fill my final days with love. Dogbert: You ruined my ears, jerk!